I've stopped paying attention to all the casting news surrounding the 97 horror shows currently in the works but this one is kind of interesting. Mr. Brad Anderson, who made me giddy with "Session 9" has been confirmed to be directing the pilot episode of "Midnight Sun". The show focuses on an FBI agent trying to track down a strange cult that went missing. As I've mentioned in the past Julia Stiles stars in the show and I've run out of 90's dance movie jokes so lets just move on.
I want you to sit down for this one because it's going to punch you in the face. I'm just going to say it. "Halloween 3D" has been put up on the shelf for the time being. I know it hurts, but we're going to get through this together. Originally set for an October release this year the film has yet to be cast or even written and as it stands now the release date is TBD. So there's still hope that it will happen. Let's all pray tonight.
Good news kids, I think, the horror anthology flick "V/H/S" has finally been given a release date of October 5th for the limited theater run and August 31st for VOD. The film is about a group of robbers who uncover a gaggle of video tapes in a house and find their contents to be rather disturbing. There's too many directors to names attached to this thing so expect it to be 4 hours and feature 10 minute segments from each one of them.
More casting news for "The Evil Dead"! Shout it from the rooftops my friends. Jessica Lucas and Elizabeth Blackmore have both been added to the cast leading me to believe there's not going to be a single man in the film. I base this of course on the news that Jane Levy is playing the lead role and by ignoring the IMDB page that lists two males on the cast list.
In Real People News:
A Florida man is in hot water after he finally snapped at his job and pulled a gun on a person for complaining about the love seat he just bought. The complaint that drove him over the edge? The guy had the balls to come into the store and complain that the couch was riddled with bed bugs. Where do these people get off!?
Never let it be said that they don't do things to the extreme in California. Like this guy who didn't just shoot his ex with a gun. No he went the extra mile and blew her up with a cannon. Where the hell do you even get cannon balls these days?
To see boobies in 3D or not to see boobies in 3D. That is the question. It's a tough one, and unfortunately we're all going to have to answer it because Dimension films has just dropped that "Piranha 3DD" will be released both theatricality and on VOD at the same time. So will the dirtbag in me who wants to see bouncy things in 3D win over the part of me that hates seeing sunlight. I for one can't wait to see how this turns out.
There's so many genre shows in the works I almost forgot that there's already one I watch and kind of like. It's "American Horror Story". It's fun to learn things about each other isn't it? But the news here is that Evan Peters, Sarah Paulson, and Lily Rabe will all be returning for Season 2 as different characters. The story this season will take place on the East Coast and focus on Jessica Lange's character. I also really enjoy ice cream and Neil Diamond. I love you.
New movie alert! Oh god I love new movie alerts. The project is called "The Occult" and already has Rufus Sewell, Anne Heche, and Alycia Debnam-Carey in the cast. What's more it'll be directed by Christian E. Christiansen who directed "The Roomate" and that movie was terrible! Are you pumped? I was too excited to read the plot, but I did skim it and there's something about the devil's daughter coming to earth and a small town with some girls and some killings. Oh man, it's the best Monday ever.
Good for Julia Stiles. She's landed the lead role in the upcoming NBC series "Midnight Sun" about a FBI agent trying to track down a cult that mysteriously disappeared. I believe we're one step closer to finally seeing a "Save the Last Dance 2".
I've always though it would be cool to be in the Guinness Book of World Records. So did this guy in Sri Lanka apparently, because he attempted to break the record for longest time buried alive. He died though so I don't think he wins and there's a ton of people who have been buried dead for longer than him, so I think he's kind of f'ed.
"Masks" is a heart warming little tale about an aspiring young actress who travels to Germany to be taught in a school that was once led by an insane instructor who killed himself after his techniques were banned. From what I can tell those techniques includes forcing people to scream after each other and then have an orgy while covered in blood. For your viewing pleasure a few images and a new trailer has hit the tubes and surprise surprise, it's bat shit insane.
"Yellowbrickroad" has absolutely nothing to do with "The Wizard of Oz" and most of all has no regard for spaces in between words. It does though sound pretty cool and the new trailer that's up looks pretty trippy. The movie focuses on a research group that uncovers a mysterious trail that an entire town went down and disappeared over 70 years ago. I hope there's munchkins at least. Those little fellas are adorable.
To say the last season of "Dexter" was kind of a bummer is putting it mildly but according to the new teaser for Season 6 all hell is going to break loose. The only reason I believe it is because they do a recap of previous seasons in the clip and don't even mention the storyline of season 5. It's like Julia Stiles never existed! It's like I haven't watched "Save the Last Dance" and cried like a baby every Christmas Eve for the last 10 years.
Lastly, tune in to tonight's "Attack of the Show" on G4 to see the brand spanking new trailer for "Final Destination 5". Or don't actually. I'm not going to lose any sleep either way. I can't keep tabs on all you sickos.
Lastly some sad news. Dana Wynter, who played Becky Driscoll in the original 1956 version of "Invasion of the Body Snatchers" passed away last Thursday at the age of 79. She also guested on "Hart to Hart" and "Magnum, P.I." so there's a 75% chance I had a boyhood crush on her.
How the hell is there already a trailer for "Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides"? Did it just get announced a couple weeks ago? maybe I'm wrong. But anyway this one looks very promising my friends! There's 0 Orlando Bloom's and countless zombies. Johnny Depp's dreamy pools of seduction he calls eyes and... zombies. I smell a winner here.
Here's another shot of John Cusack as Edgar Allan Poe in the upcoming film "The Raven". John looks legit but what is wrong with that freakin bird? It's got devil eyes! I don't trust that bird, it wants to snatch my soul and take it back to it's bird house and feed it to it's little devil bird chicks. We should move on.
With season 5 of "Dexter" in the books it's now time for Julia Stiles to look back and reflect on her season long run with everyone's favorite serial killer. For those of you who haven't watched the final episode yet don't worry, she doesn't spoil what happens.
If there is one thing you can say about porn stars it's that they are versatile. Case in point, one Miss Tori Black who plays a hooker down on her luck that gets more than she bargained for with a special client in the new straight to DVD flick "Half Moon". You see she's versatile because she... well she doesn't have to... well I can't imagine you see anything going into her... I don't know folks, if it aint broke don't fix it.
In Real People News:
An inmate in California is demanding special meals in order to comply with his belief in the holiday of Festivus. This is awesome. I wonder if I can start asking for this on flights and demand that I get to wrestle the pilot.
You know how annoying it is when you're going through the drive-thru at a fast food joint and the guy working the speaker is being a real prick? Well here's a guy in Illinois who got fed up and tossed a dead squirrel through the window. Well played my friend.