john cusack

Grand Piano's Pulpy Love of High & Low

In Eugenio Mira’s “Grand Piano” renowned concert pianist Tom Selznick (Elijah Wood) reemerges from early retirement after he chokes during a concert attempting to play the “Unplayable Piece” by his mentor Patrick Godureaux. Following Patrick’s death, Tom is convinced by his star actress wife Emma (Kerry Bishé) to return to the stage playing Patrick’s piano in his remembrance. Hesitant to bring shame to his mentor, Tom experiences intense anxiety made more pressing by media inquires and some hazing from the orchestra. (They call him Failznick!

The Factory (REVIEW)

Hollywood always attempts to make the planets align when it comes to horror movies. Taking every successful film from the past and morphing all of those ideas into one film has to work! Right? Sadly, no, that’s not how it works. At least that didn’t work for Warner Bros. crime thriller with a splash of horror mojo, “The Factory”. Take one part “Silence of the Lambs”, a little “Manhunter”, and add every Ashley Judd crime thriller available and “The Factory” is born. While it may be a distorted love child of the past, it has a strong cast, great photography, and a surprisingly twisted twist.

Horror Headlines: Thursday, July 5th, 2012

"Motel" is a new thriller about a hit man brought to a secluded motel in the delta bayou who finds he must battle his peers for survival. Sounds like the worst vacation in the world? Am I right? And what's the deal with airplane food! Anyway John Cusack, Robert De Niro and Crispin Glover have all been added to the cast so maybe it wouldn't be such a bad trip after all. Well unless that Glover guy goes in the pool. He's so pale. It'll frighten the children.

I don't know why I just assumed that the "Total Recall" remake was going to be rated R but it looks like the scamps over at the MPAA have dropped the bomb that it will in fact be slapped with a PG-13 tag. This pretty much ruins the hopes I had of seeing an updated version of the 3 boobed hooker. Thanks guys, thanks for ruining our nation's birthday.

Entrepreneur Marc Siwak is working on plans that would bring a live action zombie based theme park called "Z World" to the Detroit area.The plan would take over 200 acres of abandoned housing and factories and turn them into an overnight adventure where people can live in their very own zombie outbreak. I don't want to spoil anything but I'm pretty sure if you want to run for your life in Detroit you can pretty much do that for free now pretty easily.

It's the day after the 4th of July so it's really slow and truth be told right now I'm pretty caught up with video footage of Lita Ford singing "If I Close My Eyes Forever" at a recent concert so I'm just going to tell you that Jena Malone has apparently landed the role of Johanna Mason in "The Hunger Games: Catching Fire". I know what you're wondering and the answer is yes, Lita sings the Ozzy part and yes she goes right into "Kiss Me Deadly".

In Real People News: 

Three women in Florida getting arrested for prostitution isn't news. I mean unless one of them is named "Donkey". Then it's a cover story in my book.

If you're going to go to town on yourself while sticking a water gun up your backside don't do it while driving. That's just unsafe for everyone.

Trailers: "The Raven" confounds

I love me some John Cusack as much as the next guy but ya, this looks terrible. Thankfully it still says "COMING SOON", so we won't have to sit through it for a good long while.

Posters: "The Raven" is still a mystery to me

"Coming soon" from the dude who brought you V For Vendetta, this weird Edgar Allen Poe movie starring John Cusack that no one seems to be able to make sense of. It's like Sherlock Holmes, only if he were actually Edgar Allen Poe, but not old and sad, more like young and emo. And he's tracking down a serial killer. Make sense yet? (click to enhance...)

Horror Headlines: Tuesday, September 13th, 2011

Canadian director Bruce McDonald has named "Dark Highway" as his next venture into the world of horror. The film tells the story of a man who struggles with what is real and what isn't while he tries to complete a day long journey. You might know McDonald from his previous film "Pontypool" which the majority of us went gaga for. Or if you're Canadian you might know him from the maple syrup isle of your local grocery store.

Vanessa Hudgens has joined the cast of "Frozen Ground", a new film which tells the story of serial killer Robert Hansen, a Alaskan man who abducted 24 women and hunted them on his land. John Cusack and Nic Cage were previously confirmed to play Hansen and the officer who must find the bodies of the victims and I've already used my "Con-Air" jokes so lets just move along.

"Resident Evil: Retribution" is the next installment in the "Resident Evil" series and it looks like Colin Salmon, who you might remember from the first film, has joined the cast. Fans of the VH1 series "Single Ladies" might also recognize Salmon from his role of Jerry Waters, the witty fast talking lawyer with a heart of gold. I'm kidding, I have no idea what that show is about or if it's still on the air.

A gaggle of new stills and a teaser for "Dog Soldiers: Legacy", a new web series based on the 2002 Neil Marshall film, have popped up online thanks to Ryan Lightbourn. I say thanks because it looks kind of fun but if it turns out to be crap I'll take that thanks right away Mr. Lightbourn, if that is your real name. Anyway it looks like a sequel for the werewolf flick is also in the works so get excited. Or don't.. no skin off my back either way.

In Real People News: 

Now I'm not an expert on the subject but I'm thinking if you're going to be shooting kiddie porn on your camera you might not want to take it down to the local CVS for development. But here's a D.C. man who did just that. Who uses regular film anymore? Upgrade to digital buddy, it's what all the deviants are doing.

It's good to be proud of your daughters for winning a fight, I think. It's bad to video tape your two daughters fighting and posting it on the internet though. I know that because this Indiana woman went to jail for it. That's the only reason I know it to be honest.

Snapshot: "The Factory" (2011)

Jennifer Carpenter and John Cusack star in this serial killer thriller about a detective who discovers his daughter has been kidnapped by a madman who targets prostitutes. I've been following this one for some time now since I found out the backdrop of the movie is my hometown of Buffalo, NY (although it was actually filmed in Canada). No word yet as to when Dark Castle will release this one in theaters, but its date has already been pushed back a number of times so we may be waiting a while for this one.

Horror Headlines: Tuesday December 14th, 2010

How the hell is there already a trailer for "Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides"? Did it just get announced a couple weeks ago? maybe I'm wrong. But anyway this one looks very promising my friends! There's 0 Orlando Bloom's and countless zombies. Johnny Depp's dreamy pools of seduction he calls eyes and... zombies. I smell a winner here.

Here's another shot of John Cusack as Edgar Allan Poe in the upcoming film "The Raven". John looks legit but what is wrong with that freakin bird? It's got devil eyes! I don't trust that bird, it wants to snatch my soul and take it back to it's bird house and feed it to it's little devil bird chicks. We should move on.

With season 5 of "Dexter" in the books it's now time for Julia Stiles to look back and reflect on her season long run with everyone's favorite serial killer. For those of you who haven't watched the final episode yet don't worry, she doesn't spoil what happens.

If there is one thing you can say about porn stars it's that they are versatile. Case in point, one Miss Tori Black who plays a hooker down on her luck that gets more than she bargained for with a special client in the new straight to DVD flick "Half Moon". You see she's versatile because she... well she doesn't have to... well I can't imagine you see anything going into her... I don't know folks, if it aint broke don't fix it.

In Real People News: 

An inmate in California is demanding special meals in order to comply with his belief in the holiday of Festivus. This is awesome. I wonder if I can start asking for this on flights and demand that I get to wrestle the pilot.

You know how annoying it is when you're going through the drive-thru at a fast food joint and the guy working the speaker is being a real prick? Well here's a guy in Illinois who got fed up and tossed a dead squirrel through the window. Well played my friend.

Horror Headlines: Tuesday November 16th, 2010

Hey here's something awesome to kick off your Tuesday. It's three pricks who are taking your childhood memories and taking a big old crap on them. Some might also call it a video with the three guys that MTV has cast in their new "Teen Wolf" series. I like my description better though.

Mike White, who is apparently a director, has been chosen to make the moving pictures for the big screen adaptation of "Pride and Prejudice and Zombies". Now before you go thinking this might be something to get worried about let me remind you that Mr. White wrote "Nacho Libre". So that's something, right?

Is this true? Pang Ho-Cheung's "Dream Home" is the first Japanese slasher flick? How the hell is that possible? What have they been doing for all these years? Dressing up like giant hamsters and having sex with each other? Oh wait, that's probably it so don't laugh. Don't laugh!

And here's your first look at John Cusack as Edgar Allan Poe in "The Raven". Spoiler alert, it looks like John Cusack with a goatee and one leg. Alright the one leg thing is a lie but I figured the goatee wasn't really much so I spiced it up a bit. I'm sorry I hurt you like that.

In Real People News: 

Well if you're going to get arrested for a DUI then you might as well go the distance and piss on the police cruiser while you're at it. Anything else is really just half-assing it.

What's worse than getting a tattoo of your girlfriends name and then breaking up with her? Having her try to cut the tattoo of your neck rather than letting you live the rest of your life with it. That's a fact.

Horror Headlines: Thursday October 14th, 2010

Well here's something you don't see every day. The release of the "Fright Night" remake has actually been pushed up from an October 2011 release to August. I don't think I've ever heard of a horror film actually having a release date moved up. This has to be one of the signs of the apocalypse.

Luke Evans and Alice Eve have both joined the cast of the big screen version of Edgar Allan Poe's "The Raven". It's already been announced that John Cusak will play Poe and I will not understand a word of the dialog. Can't wait!

If you don't have "Walking Dead" fever by now there's a solid chance you're a commie. There I said it. Commies won't be excited to see the new TV spot for the AMC series and they hate freedom. Therefore if you're not excited after you watch thee new trailer than you hate freedom and you are of course a commie. That's simple math, folks.

Hollywood's El Capitan Theater will be showing "The Nightmare Before Christmas" in 4D this month, meaning the movie will be in 3D and the theater will also feature wind and fog along with some special guests. I love this movie and to date I've paid to see it when it was released, paid to see it in 3D, bought it on VHS, bought it on DVD and finally on Blu-Ray. Well played on the 4D Mr. Burton but you've already got enough of my money.

In Real People News: 

You ever get drunk and go over to your buddy's house to mess with him? Well Two guys in Uniontown PA took that idea to the next level by getting hammered and knocking on the local police station door. Apparently they don't look kindly on that sort of thing. Good to know.

On this day in history: 

1968 – An earthquake rated at 6.8 on the Richter Scale destroys the Australian town of Meckering, Western Australia, and it also ruptures all nearby main highways and railroads.

Around the Web

Syndicate content

What's New?

We talk about Joe's feelings. ALL of them.

Podcast

So this one's quite the... head-scratcher...

Podcast

Latest Reviews

Search

Around The Web