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Audition (REVIEW)

It’s pretty bizarre to me that, as notorious as the film “Audition” is, I’d somehow I’d made it this long without either watching it or even so much as hearing any of the specifics of the movie. In fact the only thing I’d really known about this movie is that it was one of the films that helped inspire “Hostel,” thereby helping to launch the “torture-porn” craze in horror here in the States.

Episode 231 - "The Collection"

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Why does she have two bras on? I don't get it.

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The Collection (REVIEW)

The Collector in The Collection

Having now helmed his second feature film -- the previous being "The Collector" -- the time has come to weigh in on one Marcus Dunstan, Director. The verdict is not looking good. Consider if you will, "The Collection."

Episode 226 - "Paranormal Activity 4"

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We review the biggest practical joke of the Halloween season...

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Episode 187 - "11-11-11"

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It's definitely... a movie...

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Horror Headlines: Wednesday April 13th, 2011

Bradley Cooper is reportedly in talks to take the lead role in the much discussed remake of the 90's film "The Crow". Wait what now? Not that Cooper is the greatest actor of all time but I had assumed the remake would be on the discount DVD shelves before it's opening weekend was over. Now, I don't know what to think. Up is down, black is white, Finkle is Einhorn and Einhorn is a man!

If you're like me then you had a lot of questions after you watched the final "Saw" movie. The largest of course being why the hell did I watch 27 of these movies. There was 27 of them right? Well, surprisingly James Wan and Leigh Whannell say that Jigsaw could rise again if they were approached with a new and different idea to get the ball rolling again. Just so we're clear fellas, I will do everything in my power to stop this, and you will have to murder me. Your move gentlemen!

The good people at Paramount have picked up the rights to the Ray Bradbury joint "The Martian Chronicles" with the intentions of making a big screen adaptation of the short story collection. That's kind of obvious though isn't it, Paramount is a movie company so why would they buy the rights to a story if they didn't want to make a movie out of it. I'm sorry I'm so dumb and waste your time like this.

"Dark City" star Rufus Sewell has landed the role of Adam in the upcoming big screen adaptation of the book "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter". For those of you not familiar with the book, Adam is the head vampire and the second greatest enemy of Mr. Lincoln. The first of course being people who hate beards. Because, ya know, he had one and all I guess. I'm not a Social Studies textbook people.

In Real People News: 

Sometimes it's just hard to say goodbye to a loved one. Case in point these twin brothers in Huston who lived in a house with their dead mother for almost 3 months before police arrested them. Wait they arrested them for murder? They killed her? Well, that changes everything doesn't it.

Love will make you do crazy things. Case in point this police officer in Miami who threatened his girlfriend with a gun, verbally assaulted her and dragged her around the house by her hair. Why would he do this? Word is, she wouldn't hold his hand. I don't like to judge, but he might of overreacted a bit. What do I know though?

Horror Headlines: Monday January 24th, 2011

James Wan and Leigh Whannell are the duo that brought you "Saw" and now they've got a trailer for a new film called "Insidious". It's a heartwarming tale of a kid that lives in a house that's having all kind of weird haunted type stuff going on in it. Here's the catch though, it's not the house that's haunted, it's the kid! Dun dun duuuuun!

Last week we talked about our feelings and the fact that there might be an Alfred Hitchcock biopic in the works. Well now we can chat again because there's rumors that Sir Anthony Hopkins is the front runner to play our favorite rollie pollie horror icon. We should also make childish comments about the name Hitchcock and giggle like girls.

"The Silent House" is a movie from Chris Kentis and Laura Lau, the peeps who brought you "Open Water" and today the film's got a clip up on the tubes. Doesn't look like too silent of a house to me! Get it? Cause of the title? It's a pun... or a play on words... or a poem. I don't know.

Is there a video game version of "The Walking Dead" in the works? The world may never know! Wait no, that's wrong. We'll know, we'll know on February 17th when game developers Telltale announce their new big game that's based on a "a just-launched property from the TV and comic book world whose popularity is changing life as some know it." It really could be anything!

In Real People News: 

Finally someone has the guts to stand up to hookers who half ass their jobs! Hubert Blackman recently filed a lawsuit against a call girl service in Vegas after the girl he paid to have sex with ditched out on him after a half hour even though he paid for a full hour. Justice must be served!

Sometimes the stress of being a teacher just gets to be too much and you need to take some time off. Like this second grade teacher in Oakland who went on administrative leave after a number of sex acts, including oral sex, happened in the class while while the teacher was actually in the class. So now second graders are getting further then I did in High School. Nothing depressing about that!

Are You Scared? (REVIEW)

Review: Are You Scared?

In the horror drought that follows October, people get desperate for scares – desperate enough to wade into the Watch Instantly vaults and watch damn near anything in hope that it will be either sufferable or incredibad, which is how I imagine most viewers will find “Are You Scared?” Unfortunately, the film evokes neither of those adjectives.

Episode 140 - "Saw 3D"

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It's Saw time, bitches!

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Saw 3D (REVIEW)

Saw 3D's Costas is Watching You

Nearly two-thirds of the way through "Saw 3D" there comes a scene wherein the primary target of one of Jigsaw's traps must extract two of his back molars in order to find a numerical code etched on them. Let's put aside the fact that etching numbers onto someone's back molars, while still in their mouth, without them realizing the numbers are there, goes well beyond the realm of fantastic. What's more interesting about the sequence is that it almost immediately begins to feel like a snickering metaphor for the "Saw" franchise.

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