prisoners

The Best!

10. Warm Bodies
2013 has been full of zombie movies, games, and books, so it was nice to have some comedy in the midst of all of the “serious” zombie business. Nick Holt managed to be an engaging and fun zombie just looking for some love.

9. Mama

As with any horror sub-genre type, the more films that we consume the more we become aware of the rules and possibilities. The slasher genre had its deep cuts during the early to late 1980’s but eventually their impact became that of a paper cut due to their paper thin plots and supposed ending twists. Even the thriller genre isn’t free from fizzling down to a pile of ash. The number of mystery films released with a solid misdirecting plot has become so dismal that any sign of a new iteration is exhausting.

It seems like every band out there is putting their music out on cassette tapes these days because they know hipsters think it's clever and will pay 10 bucks for something they probably can't even play. Well it was only a matter of time before the horror world caught on and what better movie to leave the charge than the home invasion anthology flick "V/H/S". The film will be released on the classic big box this coming January in a limited run of only about 300 copies. If you buy all 300 copies I'm pretty sure you get a free 6 pack of PBR.

Terrence Howard has joined Hugh Jackman and Jake Gyllenhaal in the cast of the upcoming hey you kidnapped my kid so I'm going to torturer the crap out of you flick "Prisoners". The flick is set to start shooting in February and in case you are wondering yes I'd like to go on a weekend trip with Terrence Howard to some sort of mountain resort where we just relax and get to know each other.

"Mara" is a new Swedish film that just got picked up for US distribution and stars Angelica Jansson, a Swedish model making her film debut. If you still need to know what the movie is about to want to see it I hate your guts but it follows a young woman who returns to the home where she witnessed a murder many years ago only to find herself trapped by an a intruder. She's a Swedish model. Shame on you for asking any other questions.

Show of hands, who still has a crush on Goldie Hawn? No one? How is that possible!? Well screw you for judging me. I ask because "Death Becomes Her", the 92 flick in which she co-starred in has been picked up by the folks at Bravo for a new hour long series. Robert Zemeckis will produce the show based on the film about two women who purchase a potion that gives them eternal life. You can't deny that Meryl Streep is the greatest woman to ever live can you? You're a monster.