let me in

BGH Classic Pack - Remake-Apolooza! Vol. 3

Remakes: can't live with'em, can't murder everyone involved with'em. The silver lining of course is that modern horror's remake insanity has given rise to some epic podcast episodes. In previous classic packs we've combined some of the best and worst of recent horror remakes.

Horror Headlines: Wednesday May 25th, 2011

"Let Me In" Wunder-Director Matt Reeves has signed on to tackle the Frankenstein flick "This Dark Endeavor" based on the book with the same name. The film is just the latest in a long line of Frankenstein based films to be announced which means 2012 could very much be the year of the reanimated dead. Neck bolts are going to be soooo hot, I can just feel it.

The latest name to be added to the cast of "Dexter" season 6 is none other than Edward James Olmos. Colin Hanks and Mos Def have already been signed on and I can only assume that the addition of Olmos means that Dexter will be moving to a rough inner city and Olmos will play a teacher who shows him the powers of math. That's not racist, he did it in "Stand and Deliver".

So many people have been added to the cast of "Hunger Games" that I have officially forgotten what the movie is even about and now that Lenny Kravitz is on board I just want to punch it right in the face. I'm kidding, it's about two areas that send children to battle each other. I'm not kidding about the punching in the face though, Lenny Kravitz is a prick.

If you're like me then you spend most of your time as a bachelor paying strange women to break into your home, tie you up and torture you for two hours. Well good news fellow deviants, the movie "Kidnapped" is everything you've dreamt of and more and there's a new trailer out for the film to prove it. Of course I don't believe there's any sort of safe word involved in this, so that could get sketchy.

In Real People News: 

A North Carolina man is under arrest after he walked into his local Salvation Army, took off his pants and sat down on a couch with all his goodness hanging out for the world to see. Of course the obvious question here is how much is the couch discounted now that it's all covered in creepy old man juices.

Must be open season for showing your genitals in North Carolina because here's another guy who was so pissed off that his local Bojangles ran out of fried chicken that he decided to whip his bits out and show the woman working at the drive-thru window. I have no idea how that solves the chicken problem but I like his enthusiasm.

Horror Headlines: Tuesday April 19th, 2011

James Franco and Winona Ryder have signed on to star in "The Stare". In the flick Ryder will take on the role of a playwright who decide if the world is out to get her or if she's just cracking under the pressure of completing her next project. Franco will of course play a lovable stoner. Alright I don't know if that second part is true but come on, you have to assume that's what he'll be doing even if that really isn't his role.

I do believe I just found the topic for our next open week in the Podcast schedule. Rob Zombie has wrapped on a shoot in Vancouver for a commercial titled "The Torturer" for the laundry detergent brand Woolite. Weird to see a horror director taking on a commercial yes but throw in the fact that Zombie looks like a homeless man and the fact that it's for laundry detergent is enough to make blood run out of your nose. I'm sorry for doing that to you.

"Pride and Prejudice and Zombies" finally has a director my friends and it's none other than Craig Gillespie who is currently working on the "Fright Night" remake. He also directed "Mr. Woodcock" which wasn't a very good movie but it made me giggle every time I heard the name Woodcock so that's got to count for something. Teehee... Woodcock.

"Let Me In" director Matt Reeves has decided to return to the vampire genre by signing on to direct "The Passage". Based on a book by Justin Cronin the story focuses on a group of terminally ill patients who find they can be saved by being bitten by a rare bat. But wait! There's some nasty side effects. Here's a hint, they kill people.

In Real People News: 

If you're a 48 year old man from Florida being accused of child abuse there's not many excuses you can use to get out of the charges. Of course you could always try the excuse that the kids are just jealous of your roller skating abilities and making the whole thing up. That won't work either but man it's pretty funny.

Wait this is illegal? Two Texas High School students are facing charges after decapitating baby chickens in the hopes of breaking their baseball teams losing streak. I originally wrote that they decapitated a bunch of chick's heads but that sounds a lot worse if you read it wrong. Or a lot better if you have trouble getting dates. I don't judge.

Horror Headlines: Tuesday November 2nd, 2010

Be still my beating heart! Leonardo DiCaprio is confirmed to star in "The Devil in the White City", a new film based on H.H. Holmes, America's first serial killer. This will mark the first time I've ever had a man crush on a murderer. Mark this down.

Good news and bad news for fans of "The Walking Dead". The good news is the AMC series had a big ass premier with 5.3 million viewers. The bad news, that means instead of going out, getting drunk and going home with some random person you probably sat at home and watched TV. I've never been so proud and disappointed of you in my whole life.

I love every thing that comes out of Norway. Vikings, those weird ass black metal kids and that band that sang "Barbie Girl". Well add the new film "Inside a Whore", which has a new trailer online, to the list. I don't even know what it's about, I got so excited about the title I blacked out for a solid twenty minutes.

Still got "Let Me In" fever? Take a number kids! So here's a deleted clip from the film to keep your chops moist. Just to be clear though, if you're taking a number I think only 17 people went to see the movie so the line might not be too long. 17 people counting the five of us on the podcast. And no, we won't be in the line.

In Real People News: 

A Chinese boy recently fell 20 stories, landed on a car and lived. Impressive maybe for us Americans but have you seen the Chinese Circus? The guys some around like wild animals so honestly I think the kid could have gone 30 floors without an issue.

Before I explain this let me get this out of the way. I was nowhere near Maryland this past weekend. Alright, now here's a story about a man who was there and was very drunk, very much in a diaper and very much screaming profanity.

On this day in history: 

1974 – 78 die when the "Time Go-Go" Club in Seoul, South Korea burns down. Six of the victims jumped to their deaths from the seventh floor when a club official barred the doors after the fire started.

Episode 136 - "Let Me In"

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A decent remake of a foreign film? Listen and find out.

Purchase this Back Episode $0.99

Horror Headlines: Wednesday September 15th, 2010

According to the twitterverse Kevin Pollak has signed on to the cast of Kevin Smith's "Red State". The film is about a group of kids who encounter a gang of crazed fundamentalists in middle America. The good news? No mention of Jay or Silent Bob in the cast list

Gore Verbinski, the guy who directed all the "Pirates of the Caribbean" movies, still wants to make a "Bioshock" film and he's willing to murder to make it happen. Alright he probably won't go that far but he's super into making it happen. So into it he would kill! Sorry.

What's better than 6 new clips from "Let Me In"? How about 8! You guessed 7 didn't you? Of course if the movie sucks 0 would be the correct number. Either way there's a lot of math going on here and I need a nap.

Why wouldn't you do a 3D remake of the 1977 film "Kingdom of the Spiders"? Well alright there's really a long list of reasons but at this point who gives a crap. 3D is freakin awesome! Bring on the spiders and whatnot.

Magnet Releasing, which is a part of Magnolia Pictures has acquired the North American distribution rights to "Chawz". If you couldn't guess by the title the Korean film is about a giant crazed pig terrorizing a peaceful countryside. My mistake, there's no way you could have guessed what this movie is about.

In Real People News: 

Two new procedures have been approved by the FDA to help fight obesity. Both break down fat cells by cooling them to the point of no return and flushing them from your body. I look forward to the next release where it warms the fat into a creamy dip for chips and crackers.

On this day in history: 

1982 - Iran's former foreign minister, Sadegh Ghotbzadeh, was executed after he was convicted of plotting against the government

Horror Headlines: Friday September 3rd, 2010

The guys behind both "Paranormal Activity" films have plans to create a show for the small screen in the near future. The show will be called "Paranormal Activities" and will feature real ghosts doing everyday fun tasks just like us livin' folk. Alright that's a lie, but they are working on a show.

Much to my surprise "Let Me In" has received a big old R rating from the MPAA. Apparently the movie's going to feature "strong bloody horror violence, language and a brief sexual situation". Brief sexual situation? So much for being toned down.

Are Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Scarlett Johansson attached to the big screen adaptation of "Breathers: A Zombie's Lament"? Sounds iffy but I've actually read the book and I feel it's important for my self esteem to report on movies that have to do with the dozen or so books I've read over the years. Me read pretty one day!

Liam Neeson is all fired up and ready to star in "The Grey". The film focuses is on a a group of pipeline workers who come in contact with a pack of wild wolves after their plane crashes in Alaska. Liam Neeson, he's what's for dinner.

In Real People News: 

Over 300 goats have been killed in the state of Puebla down in Mexico and shepherds are pissed! The prime suspect in the crime? Chupacabra! Holy crap I love Chupacabra and everything it does. I want one as a pet.

On this day in history: 

1939 - Britain and France declared war on Germany, two days after the Nazi invasion of Poland.

Horror Headlines: Thursday September 2nd, 2010

There's a new poster floating around from the upcoming "Let Me In" flick and good news, it's French and it's got just the right amount of blood in it! For those of you French speaking readers keeping track at home "Let me In" is Le Remake of the Swedish film Le "Let the Right One In" that I thought was Le Crap!

If you were in Vegas recently and weren't in a drug induced cloud of rage then you might of scored a peak at what David Tennant is going to look like as Peter Vincent in the upcoming "Fright Night" remake. Then again if you were in Vegas and were spending your time looking for horror movie posters then I don't think you deserve to be reading my news. I bid you good day sir... Good day sir!

Maybe I'm out of touch good people at Spike but I've been reading your nominees for the Ultimate Scream category for your 2010 Scream Awards and I'm a bit confused as to why something like "Avatar" is nominated. Does Ultimate Scream mean I should be screaming at my computer while reading your stupid ass nominee list? Cause ya got me!

Want to experience a producer and a director give each other high fives via the written word? You're in luck then! Eli Roth and Daniel Stamm recently sat down with Empire Magazine to discuss "The Last Exorcism", mashed potatoes and fashion. Spoiler! Eli Roth is a charming SOB.

In Real People News: 

Tasers are so hot right now! Just yesterday a student at Westlake Middle School in North Carolina felt the tasers wrath after she refused to stop choking a smaller boy in her school. If I had tased every girl who made me feel like crap in middle school 85% off the yearbook photos would of featured girls with smoldering hair.

On this day in history: 

1666 - The Great Fire of London broke out. It destroyed nearly 400 acres, including some 13,000 houses and the old St. Paul's Cathedral.

Horror Headlines: Tuesday July 27th, 2010

A new red band trailer for "Let Me In", the US remake of the Swedes "Let the Right One In" has found it's way online. At this point I've run out of clever ways to say how much I hated the original so let's just accept that we're American and we're better than everyone else. Let freedom ring.

Twenty years ago the newly released clip of Tiffany and Debbie Gibson having a cat fight for the Syfy flick "Mega Python vs. Gatoroid" would of made my Jams all kinds of tight. But I haven't worn Jams in close to twenty years so now it's just making my big boy shorts tight. See how that didn't turn out like you hoped it would?

After very much not being released back in March the Nic Cage film "Season of the Witch" is now seeing some re-shoots. Since they're going back and redoing some scenes why not toss in John Travolta and have him switch faces with Nic. Then have the two of them race around the country looking for secret treasures hidden in national landmarks. You're welcome Lionsgate, you can keep that one.

Hot news out of Comic-Con this past weekend that the much delayed film "All the Boys Love Mandy Lane" may be getting a release in the near future. By this point I'm sure most of the boys have moved on from Mandy to the skeezy girl down the street.

In Real People News: 

A Pittsburgh area man robbed a bank recently while wearing a woman's blond wig, fake breasts and clown pants. There's got to be some kind of sicko fetish site out there for this sort of crap and I for one plan on using most of today's work day to find it.

On this day in history: 

1940 - Bugs Bunny made his debut in the Warner Bros. animated cartoon "A Wild Hare."

Horror Headlines: Monday July 26th, 2010

Elizabeth Shue continues to mount her comeback using the horror genre as she signs on to "The House at the End of the Street" directed by Mark Tonderai.

The Matt Reeves remake of "Let Me In" is on the move as Overture Films sells off the marketing and distribution rights to Relativity Media. Despite Overture's semi successful releases with "Pandorum" and "The Crazies", the company will be closing its doors after three years.

Wes Craven is dipping his toes into the comic market as he partners with Liquid Comics for an undisclosed graphic novel project.

In Real People News: 

In a burst of heated nerd passion, two Comic Con attendees fought this past weekend over a seat in the conventions Hall H, resulting in one man stabbing the other in the eye with a pen. And here I thought a stabbing at comic con would likely be over a booth babe... guess I was wrong.

19 ravers die and over 340 of them were injured as Germany's annual Love Parade Rave turns into a stampede. What caused the stampede is yet unknown, but I'm guessing it wasn't "love".

On this day in history: 

1991 - Actor Paul Reubens (aka "Pee-wee Herman") is arrested in Sarasota, Florida for masturbating twice inside the South Trail XXX Cinema.

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