Two days in a row. I'm taking the rest of the month off.
Ah right, there's a "Terminator" reboot in the works. It was really only a matter of time, but now that "Game Of Thrones" director Alan Taylor is being tossed around as a possible director I'm somewhat interested. And by interested I mean I assume I'll like the movie for 20 minutes and then be completely confused about what the hell is going on and who all these people are. When the hell is winter going to actually come!?
The big screen adaptation of "Dark Places" has added Drea de Matteo, of "Sopranos" fame, to its ever growing cast list. Based on the book by the same name, the film tells the story of a woman who's forced to revisit the events of her families murder when she was 7 and the brother who she testified against as the murderer. Charlize Theron and Christina Hendricks are also in the movie... Boobs.
All child actors are frightening, creepy and should be locked in cages like zoo animals. But i understand they are a necessity in some films. Like the "Poltergeist" remake, which has just cast Kyle Catlett of "The Following's", in one of its little people roles. They should have handlers like animals and be cleaned with hoses. Just saying.
Universal has picked up Lee Shipman and Brian McGreevy to pen the script to another remake of H.G. Wells' "The Island Of Dr. Moreau". Why the hell not huh?
In Real People News:
Here's a heartwarming story about a Georgia based animal shelter that for 100$ promised to find new homes for dogs whose owners could no longer take care of them but instead just went ahead and killed them. Wait no, that's not heartwarming at all.
This morning the bus stop I wait at smelled just like fresh baked bread. I can't explain to you how depressing it is knowing that the bus stop at 830am is going to be the highlight of my day.
I have no idea what a man is doing with the name "Kit" but "Game of Thrones" is awesome so I'm going to give Kit Harington a pass. I will however not give him a pass for signing on to a new exoticism flick titled "The Seventh Son". I will though give him a pass for being in an exoticism movie where Jeff Bridges plays the guy who trains old Kit on the art of driving out demons, catching witches and stopping boggarts. Confused? Me too man, me too.
Jack O'Connell, now that's a man's name. I've never seen a movie the guy has been in but I assume they're all about cutting down timber and drinking beer. Lucky for Alice Englert because they've both joined the cast of "Beautiful Creatures", a new supernatural thriller about two southern teens who uncover strange secrets about each other's families. Just say the name, O'Connell. Do you suddenly smell maple syrup too?
WWE hot boy David Bautista has been confirmed to be joing Vin Diesel in the upcoming flick "The Chronicles of Riddick: Dead Man Stalking". No word yet on what WWE's golden god will be doing in the film but my guess is he'll probably fight people and have very few lines of dialog. Maybe even Vin Diesel. God I can't wait to find out. I have no idea what a "WWE hot boy" is.
I have no idea why you'd need "Plan 9 From Outer Space" on Blu-Ray but the cult classic, along with 1960's "Little Shop Of Horrors" (the one without singing) will hit shelves on March 9th, just in time for Middle Name Pride Day. So.. umm... how about them Giants?
There's nothing more fun than nutso clowns battling each other to the death is there? Well "The Last Circus" is here to make all your wildest dreams come true and today there's a red band trailer for the big top blood bath. The film revolves around a love triangle between a sad clown, a trapeze artist and her abusive happy clown husband. Sounds like what Cirque du Soleil would be if it was tolerable.
Get in line now kids because on October 26, 2012 "Halloween 3" will hit the theaters! No director has been picked for the third installment of the much debated Rob Zombie reboot but there's little to no chance Robbie will have anything to do with it. Which is good for haters of the first two but really bad for lovers of slow motion pan shots set to crappy 70's cover songs. Correction: Patrick Lussier will direct "Halloween 3D". You can go back to planning your next D&D gathering in your mom's basement now.
I was pretty down on the "Conan the Barbarian" remake for a long time but since watching Jason Momoa, who will play Conan, on "Game of Thrones" I've become more and more fired up. Now there's a new red band trailer and TV spot for the remake and I think I'm going to run out and get myself a loin cloth and sword. Once I get those I can really focus on getting washboard abs and being cast in the sequel.
"The House at the End of the Street" has been kicking around for a while now and as of today it looks like the film will finally see the light of day on April 20th of next year, yes that's 4/20 you filthy hippies. The movie stars Jennifer Lawrence and Elizabeth Shue as a mother daughter combo (try to guess which is which) that move into a house where a family was mysteriously murdered and begin to uncover the community's spooky secrets. It's Shue who plays the mother, that Lawrence girl is like 20, people. I wish you'd think before you answer sometimes.
In Real People News:
Police in New York are investigating what they think might have been a suicide of a woman after she let her pet Black Mamba bite her. I can honestly think of no worse way to off myself thean by letting a snake have at me. I've said it before and I will say it again, snakes are the worst things ever invented and serve no purpose in this beautiful world we live in.
A woman in Florida is under arrested after she reportedly urinated off a pier, smacked a kid that wasn't her own and then tried to run down the same kid along with her own two toddlers. Why did she do all this? Because she downed a box of wine and 2 Mike's Hard Lemonades of course. I'm pretty sure that was kind of obvious though.