screen gems

Horror Headlines: Monday October 7th, 2013

Word around campus is that Neil Marshall will direct the film adaptation of the graphic novel "Kong: King Of Skull Island". The story is set after the original tale of King Kong and follows the events after Kong's body had disappeared. I have nothing sarcastic to say about this because it sounds awesome. I will though point out how ridiculous it sounded when Tim Curry said "gorilla" in 1995's "Congo".

I have absolutely no idea how the movie business works. I say this because Dimension films has just picked up the rights to "Horns", the big screen adaption of the Joe Hill novel starring Daniel Radcliffe. This confuses me because the film has been in the works for a while now and I assume has wrapped on filming so why the hell is it it just getting picked up? I mean I get it when it's some B-movie softcore porn flick but this is Harry Potter. Someone explain this to me? I don't understand things.

Screen Gems has bought the rights to "The Unsacred", a new supernatural thriller from writer Amanda Gusack. You might know her from the 2005 horror film "In Memorium" but most likely you recognize the name from my one man all drag stage show based on the life of John Cusack. Think about it for a second, it makes total sense.

Jason Blum, the guy who's produced every horror movie you've scene in the past 10 years, is teaming up with Kevin McCormick to bring "White Smoke" to life. As you might have guessed by the title the project will follow a number of spooky time events that put the Vatican on its heels. No word yet on when the project will see the light of day but Jeff Richard and Mark Bianculli are lined up to pen the script for the project. Priests, they're so hot right now.

In Real People News: 

Hugs are wonderful. Except if your better half is packing heat and accidentally shoots and kills you when you hug him. Then they are kind of shitty.

I've wanted to punch a lot of people in the face over the past 35 years but I'll be the first one to admit that this California guy who punched a young convenience store worker because he didn't have enough money for his $1.41 cigar might have gone too far. Alright, he 100% did. You got me.

Horror Headlines: Thursday March 11th, 2010

Lionsgate has announced that the upcoming Ryan Reynolds thriller "Buried" will hit North American theaters on September 24th. Seeing how they'll stretch this very thin premise into a feature-length film will be interesting if nothing else

Does anybody really watch these Suicide Girls DVDs? If so, I guess you're in the luck. Two new discs featuring a bevy of these horror-tinged beauties will hit retail shelves on March 16th. Make sure your insurance policy covers Carpal Tunnel Syndrome beforehand.

In Real People News: 

If a pair of women express interest after you've won a ton of money at the MGM Grand, there's a strong possibility they're going to rob you at gunpoint once you've taken your clothes off. That's what you get when you let your crotch win.

Reports are swirling around the downtown Lexington, Ky area that an extremely creepy guy riding a white bicycle has been peeping at residents over the past few weeks. If anyone is interested in crafting a sequel to "The Strangers", here's your inspiration. Creepy!

On this day in history: 

669 - Mount Etna, one of the largest volcanos in Europe, suddenly erupts, killing over 20,000 people in the process.

Horror Headlines: Wednesday March 10th, 2010

Liev Shrieber confirms in an interview that he will not be returning for "Scream IV" since his character was killed off. And here I was thinking some convoluted 'oh he survived!' plot would be a good fit for the "Scream" franchise.

Chloe Moretz, star of the upcoming remake "Let Me In", gives us the scoop on the art direction for the film. Thankfully, Chloe assures us that their vampires "aren't cool".

Screen Gems have begun to leak their info on the upcoming "Quarantine 2" with the announcement that they've hired John Pogue to write and direct as well as their plans to take the sequel in a different direction than its Spanish original.

Actor Corey Haim has been found dead. A drug overdose is currently the leading suspicion behind his death. Condolences to the Haim family on their loss.

In Real People News: 

A humble window cleaner decided he'd had enough with dirt and grime, so he attempted to kill himself by jabbing an oversized novelty pencil into his groin. Finally, the years of being called 'pencil dick' took its toll.

At least six Jersey women have found themselves hospitalized with infection after trying to get a bit more donk in their badonka-donk. Something tells me that getting the procedures done in an alley with common window caulk wasn't the brightest move they've ever made.

Around the Web

Syndicate content

What's New?

We talk about Joe's feelings. ALL of them.

Podcast

So this one's quite the... head-scratcher...

Podcast

Latest Reviews

Search

Around The Web