nightmare on elm st.

Horror Headlines: Wednesday July 1st, 2009

WOW, I'm excited that Amazon is allowing us to vote on potential covers for the "Night of the Creeps" DVD, but these are three of the worst covers ever made... for ANYTHING. Seriously, with all the amazing original cover art, how the hell did this happen?

New film called "Dances With Werewolves"... I see what they did there.

Jackie Earle Haley signed on for three "Nightmare on Elm St." films. This could either be really great or really terrible... depending on how things turn out.

In Real People News: 

This is what happens when you think you're breaking into a frail old man's house, and instead you discover that he's a former boxer. Ouch.

I can barely read the headline "Man uses nail clippers in DIY circumcision" without wanting to scream out loud in agony.

On this day in history: 

1946: Atomic Bomb testing begins, using the Nagasaki-type implosion bomb, at Bikini Atoll.

Horror Headlines: Thursday May 28th, 2009

Wanna take your top off in "A Nightmare on Elm St."? They weren't interested in me, something about "not having huge fake tits". Ah well.

A dark version of "Snow White" sounds pretty awesome, although I'm guessing they won't have to try so hard to make it scary. Those old Disney films are still terrifying.

John Lithgow joins "Dexter"... as a serial killer. I'm nominating this for best story of the week, hands down.

"Sorority Row", the remake of the 1983 film "The House on Sorority Row", has been rated "R for strong bloody violence, language, some sexuality/nudity and some partying". So "partying" gets you an R rating these days? That's interesting.

"Alien" gets a remake, apparently shooting down any hope that it might get a 5th installment. Supposedly though, Michael Costigan, Ridley Scott and Tony Scott are all on board as producers, and have picked their own director. So I guess that's good news?

In Real People News: 

Interested in buying an old funeral home at auction? Would it entice you if I said that there are 4 dead bodies decomposing somewhere in the building that have been there for years? No? You drive a hard bargain, sir.

Understaffed health clinic in Prague offers free boob jobs to prospective doctors and nurses. Hmmm... that's certainly ONE way to go.

3 legged turtle uses Tonka Toy to get around. That should fulfill your warm and fuzzy quotient for the year. I promise to get back to scaring you tomorrow.

On this day in history: 

1946: Manhattan Project scientists Klaus Fuchs and John von Neumann file for a secret patent on their design for the hydrogen bomb initiator.

Horror Headlines: Thursday May 21st, 1009

Bruce Willis to star in "Grimm", a ghost story with one of the longest synopses I've ever seen... which can be found at the link. Directed by Russel Mulcahey, who also helmed 2007's "Resident Evil: Extinction".

Lars Von Trier's controversial film "Antichrist" has been picked up by IFC films. Hot off the controversy it caused at Cannes with its graphic violence, the film will now be coming to US shores as early as this summer. No word on what type of release IFC will give the film, but they are known for non-traditional theatrical/on demand models.

New Platinum Dunes blog on their "Nightmare on Elm St." shooting. Of course they're going to be positive, but word is that Jackie Earle Haley's rendition of Krueger is just as kick-ass as most of us have anticipated. Don't get me wrong, I'm still withholding excitement, but consider my curiosity peaked.

In Real People News: 

Two seasonal workers at Yellowstone National park fired for pissing in Old Faithful. Not sure what's more intriguing about this, the fact that they didn't think there were security cameras, or that they took the safety of their penises so nonchalantly. That thing goes off while you're dangling your dong over it, and I'm pretty certain it won't be pretty.

Never cheat on a Thai woman, I'm told they're penis biters. At least that's what the internet tells me.

I'm not sure how we've had two "Montauk Monsters" wash up on Long Island shores before someone decided to mention the existence of the nearby "Plum Island Animal Disease Center". Even more perplexing, the couple who found the recent one have kept it on ice, and are having trouble finding someone to take it off their hands. Scientists love ripping shit apart to find out what it is, but no love for my boy?

On this day in history: 

1956: The Cherokee test of Operation Redwing commences over Bikini Atoll, consisting of a 3.8 megaton nuclear bomb dropped from a B-52 bomber. The bomb is successfully detonated at an altitude of 4,350 feet, but the flight crew missed their assigned target by four miles. Although it is a complete failure from a scientific standpoint, it demonstrates America's ability to deliver hydrogen bombs over long distances.

Horror Headlines: Thursday April 23rd, 2009

Brace yourself. David Slade, director of "30 Days of Night", will be directing the third film in the "Twilight" franchise, subtitled "Eclipse". Uh... what? Slade has not made a statement yet, but I'm sure someone is tracking him down right now to ask him what the hell he's thinking.

Rumors are that Rooney Mara is in final negotiations to play "Nancy" in the remake of "A Nightmare on Elm St." No confirmation yet, but the source seems reliable from what I read at the link.

The director of "S. Darko" says he's in the process of remaking the 1978 film "The Eyes of Laura Mars". That may be the most obscure sentence I've ever written.

"Chaos Experiment" is about a scientist working on a theory that humanity will devolve into violence by 2012 due to global warming, and attempting to prove that by locking a bunch of half-naked people in a sauna. Not exactly the most scientific experiment, but it is a really good way for filmmakers to force their stars to be in their underwear for 90 minutes.

A body cast of Arnold Schwarzenegger, taken at the time of the first "Terminator" film, is being used to create a fully functional CGI character of Arnie for "Terminator Salvation". THAT, should be interesting.

"Wolverine" producer looking for a writer so she can make a "Constantine" sequel. Huh, I'm one of the few that enjoyed the first "Constantine", and that sentence STILL makes my head hurt.

In Real People News: 

Police detonate a bag full of cans because they were worried there was a bomb inside, turns out it was just full of shit. Nothing to see here folks, move along.

What would you do if you found a mummified cat in the walls of your house while renovating? Apparently if you're these people, the answer is "put it back".

On this day in history: 

1951: Lenny Bruce is arrested in Miami Beach, Florida for fraudulently soliciting funds for a leper colony while dressed as a priest.

Fan made "Nightmare" Remake Trailer

What does a horror fan do when he gets sick of waiting around for the big wigs over in Hollywood to get off their asses and actually make a film? Well he goes out and makes a trailer for a movie that isn’t even filming yet.

Horror Headlines: Friday February 6th, 2009

Although not a horror film, "Watchmen" gets released wide in the US today, and I'm sure a lot of our fans will be interested in seeing it. Here's hoping it turns out half as good as it looks.

April 16th, 2010. That's the date that Platinum Dunes plans to release its "Nightmare on Elm St." remake. So, now you know.

Here's the trailer for Jake West's Indie film "Dog House. West's last film was "Punpkinhead 3" for the Scifi, and before that he directed "Evil Aliens". The story of "Doghouse" concerns a group of friends who take a vacation to a small town in the UK, only to find out that all the town's females have been infected with a virus, which based on what I saw in the trailer turns them into zombies.

I think I could get into an adaptation of this "Ghosts/Aliens" book. It's literally about "two pothead friends who set out on a question to discover both ghosts and aliens". It just got picked up by Paramount Vantage, and along with a feature film version, Comedy Central will be prepping a television show based on the property.

Wes Craven describes the villain in his film "25/8". He says he's: "a figure who lives under the river, sleeps under the bridges... eats bark". And there we have it, the secret of his anger. You'd be killing people too if you had to eat bark. That's just nasty.

In Real People News: 

What we have here is a classic story of man meets woman through personal ads, they make a connection, and she bites his tongue clear off. She was at least nice enough to put it in a plastic bag and hand it to police officers when they arrived. Ain't love grand?

It looks like the popular drug therapy of the 90's, using MDMA for psycho-therapeutic reasons, is making a comeback in Post Tramautic Stress Disorder patients. MDMA is the main ingredient in the party drug "Ecstasy", and had been used for years in therapy before it was outlawed in the 90's.

A Chinese athlete has given up dozens of medals after finding out she's really a man. Yes, you read that right, SHE JUST FOUND OUT that she's not a woman. This link must be clicked, if only for the "no shit, Sherlock" picture provided.

On this day in history: 

1918: The US naval vessel "Cyclops" vanishes in the Bermuda Triangle.

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