Dark Knight Rises

Horror Headlines: Tuesday, July 17th, 2012

We've all been sitting on pins and needles to see what's next in the ongoing tale of the big screen version of "Ouija", the classic talk to dead people "game" from Hasbro. Well Juliet Snowden and Stiles White are next in line to write and direct the flick, which has already seen a few names come and go from the production sheet, and Michael Bay is still set to produce. The duo recently worked on the upcoming kid with a demon inside flick "The Possession" in case you were wondering. In contrast Michael Bay recently finished getting a BJ from a Russian stripper who has hopes of being in "Transformers 8: Dry Hump of the Dinobots".

Hail Satan! "Rosemary's Baby" is coming to Blue-Ray on October 30th for all your demon baby Halloween needs. The disc will be chock full of interviews, making of docs and restored goodness. Plus if you buy it you'll be supporting the world's most famous sex offender. It's really a win on all accounts.

"Vamp U" is going to change the way we view film forever. I don't even care what the movie is about. I know from title alone it's going to be a game changer. And thanks to the lucky folks at Level 33 were smart enough to acquire the rights to the film. I'm sure there was a bitter bidding war over this one since it will no doubt blow all box office records away. Wait it's a vampire comedy with a guy named Wayne Gretzky who can throw his teeth? Just close production on every other movie being made in the world, Hollywood people. There's no way you're going to top this one.

It looks like David Letterman may have given away the ending to "The Dark Knight Rises" on a recent episode when he was interviewing Anne Hathaway. So here it is. SPOILER ALERT: I will still hate Anne Hathaway's guts after I see "Dark Knight Rises".

In Real People News: 

Well this a new punishment I never would have thought of. A 23 year old Texas mother is under arrest after she glued her daughter's hands to the wall. I'm not sure she thought of what to do when the "time out" was over but sometimes you learn as you go.

If you're going to check a gun to see if it works you might want to not have it pointing at your crotch when you give it a go. Because if it works, which they normally do, you will blow your balls off like this guy in Oklahoma.

Horror Headlines: Wednesday April 6th, 2011

Oh boy oh boy! "Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters 3D" is just 9 years away from hitting theaters, give or take 8 years, and today we've got our first look at pictures from the set. At least I think they're from the set. It's either the set or Germany, I still can't tell. Wait it's being filmed in Germany? This worked out perfectly!

Christopher Nolan has confirmed that next installment in the Batman franchise, titled "The Dark Knight Rises" will be filmed in the fine city of Pittsburgh, PA. I'm pretty sure the move from Chicago is happening solely because Nolan saw that same Food Network show I did about that place in Pittsburgh that makes giant sandwiches with fries on them. If I made movies I would base my locations on places I want to eat too.

I haven't seen "Wolf Creek" but Greg McLean who directed it has dreamy eyes so I feel compelled to tell you about "Crawlspace", a new underground "hey what the hell is going on here" flick. Excited? No? What if I told you the movie stars a bunch of people you've never heard of? Still no huh... How about that weather?

"It's like 'An American Werewolf In Paris' meets 'Fight Club.'" Tell me more Katee Sackhoff! I like both of those movies so I'm going to love your movie "Growl" aren't I?! Wolves fighting each other in underground tournaments while Brad Pitt commands them all to do his bidding! I assume Brad Pitt will be in this movie Katee. You can't have Werewolf Fight Club without him!

In Real People News: 

Driving and talking on a cell phone, bad. Driving and shooting up meth? That's got to be super bad, right? Of course if you're in a rush what are you suppose to do. I'm sure this women from Oklahoma had a good reason.

Ever been at a party that's super fun and everyone's dancing around to the rock n roll music and then some prick comes along and starts puking everywhere and the party is ruined? Me too! Did you want to shoot that guy in the stomach 4 times? No? Well these teenagers in Arizona didn't think it was so insane so now who's the dumb one?!

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