godzilla

Have you guys heard of this Godzilla person? Me neither.

Historically, the onset of the summer movie season means lean times for horror fans. While there is plenty of enjoyment to be dragged out of the big budget comic and light sci-fi films that pepper the summer blockbuster landscape, there’s a general lack of quality films for genre fans to sink their teeth into. Guillermo Del Toro has thrown us excitable devotees a bone this summer in the form of “Pacific Rim,” a Kaiju-tastic summer blockbuster that hits the spot not in spite of its cliches, but because of them.

The folks over at Lionsgate have picked up the US distribution rights to "Ritual", a new flick about a fella who finds his ex wife has murdered a stranger who happens to be connected to a dangerous cult. Semi-new director Mickey Keating leads this one and while there's no word on a release date the other territories will go up on the auction block next month at Cannes. I plan on picking up the rights to Guam. Gotta make that chedda.

Susan Surandon and Topher Grace would make the world's creepiest couple and the thought of them making love makes me throw up a little in my mouth but the good news here is that both of them have been confirmed for the cast of "The Calling" and not confirmed to be bumping uglies. The duo will play detectives who are on the hunt for a serial killer who's targeting the mentally ill. I bet their children would be adorable though. You can't argue that.

Sally Hawkins, who apparently is no relation to the smart guy in the wheelchair, is the latest name to be added to the cast of the upcoming "Godzilla" reboot. No word on what role she'll play but since she's British I assume she'll play a British doctor or maybe a British police officer. Or any of those roles without a British accent. Really I have no idea here.

"Pro-Wrestlers Vs. Zombies" is a real thing and the trailer looks a lot worse than you would expect. That's saying a lot I know.

I'm calling it right now. In 2014 Elizabeth Olsen and Bryan Cranston will be Hollywood's number 1 power couple. It's a bold statment I know, especially since I think Cranston is married, but they're both in talks to take on "Godzilla" in the upcoming reboot and there's no way that the two of them could be on set and not fall head over heels in love. The age difference is pretty bad too. To be honest I'm kind of disappointed in both of them.

Wait a second, "The Haunting in Connecticut 2: Ghosts of Georgia" is going direct to DVD? How is that possible? Oh well, it'll be available on April 16th so check it out. Or don't. No skin off my scrote.

Lakeshore Entertainment has picked up the rights to the graphic novel "The Sword" with plans to bring it to the big screen. The story follows a young paraplegic who finds a sword that allows her to walk again after the brutal murder of her family. No news yet on casting or who will direct but with such a heartwarming story I hope we get to see this one soon.

All the world loves Colin Firth. There's no getting around it. And now he's going to play along side Nicole Kidman in the upcoming flick "Before I Go to Sleep". The film is about a woman who wakes up every morning with no memory of the previous day, with only her husband to help her. Guess what; she finds out her husband isn't really her husband at all. Even as a prick all the world will love Colin Firth. Prediction number 2 of today's post. Mark it down.

Word around campus is that the uncomfortably attractive Aaron Taylor-Johnson is the front runner to battle the big lizard in the upcoming "Godzilla" reboot. No decision will be made until the final script is complete but if come on. Have you seen him? Mother of god he's got the yes of a angel. I've said too much haven't I.

Ellen Page, the annoying gal from "Juno", has signed on to play the lead in the big screen adaptation of "Into the Forest". Based on Jean Hegland's novel the film focuses on two sisters trying to survive as the world is falling apart. Come on you remember her. "Oh my blog". I know, makes you want to punch a baby seal doesn't it.

Wanna know something? There's a "A Nightmare on Elm Street" Blu-Ray collection coming out. It's going to be the first time that 4 through 7 have been available on Blu-Ray. They're going to be chock full of all kinds of interviews and extras. In related news I will not be purchasing any of them.

For no other reason than to be a prick and keep people talking about it "Zombieland" director Ruben Fleischer has not ruled out the possibility of a sequel. Sure he says there's no script for it, there's no cast for it and no there aren't even plans for it. Hell it doesn't even sound like he wants to do it. But ya know never say never or some other bullshit. Prick.

It's been a while since we've talked about Rob Zombie but now that his "The Lords Of Salem" is close to seeing the light of day it's time to thrust his loins back into your face. Sounds awful, right? Well it appears Mr. Zombie's witch revenge flick has sparked quite the bidding war with Anchor Bay being the front runner, offering close to $1.5 million for the film. I think we should start anew with Rob so I'll hold back on any stupid comments... I will mention how annoying his wife is though, but that's all.

If you've been on the edge of your seat waiting for the new "Godzilla" reboot then I am happy to tell you the wait is over because the good people at Warner Bros. and Legendary Pictures have announced that the flick will hit theaters on May 16th 2014. I mean you have to wait till then, and that's a pretty long time away, but you don't have to wait to know how long you have to wait. You get it? "Wait" by White Lion is a great song.

Adam Wingard's "You're Next" has also found itself a release date in the form of August 23rd 2013. The flick is about a family on vacation when they find themselves being hunted by a group of mysterious killers. They wear masks I think. If they wore Godzilla masks this would tie in really nicely wouldn't it. The lead singers of White Lion's name is Mike Tramp, that always grossed me out.

I have no idea why I keep talking about "Scary movie 5" but the rumor going around that Lindsay Lohan has faked having walking pneumonia is kind of awesome so I think you people need to know about it. Apparently she's a little pissy about the fact that the small role she was set to play had her mocking her own career and downward spiral. I for one am also pissed about it. I don't care what she does, she will always be my sweetheart. My cracked out sloppy mess of a sweetheart.

The plot for "Seven Psychopaths" might be the most confusing thing I've ever read but it also might have the greatest cast ever. The film is about a screen writer who finds inspiration when he gets caught up in a dog napping ring that mistakenly takes a psychopathic gangsters Shih Tzu. Still with me? Now to the cast, Woody Harrelson , Tom Waits and Olga Kurylenko have just been confirmed to join Colin Farrell, Christopher Walken and Sam Rockwell in the film. It's like the heavens read my diary and put together my perfect dream date.

If you loved "The Jungle Book 2" then you're going to want to sit down for this one. Writer Evan Spiliotopoulos, who also penned "The Lion King 1½" has been tapped to write the script for the upcoming big screen adaptation of the classic video game "Asteroids". Matt Lopez has already taken a pass but when you get a chance to work with the guy who wrote the script to the direct to video follow up to some classic Disney cartoons then you don't pass it up. That's just logic.

Ah crap! It looks like Robert Zemeckis has decided to step down as the as the director of the upcoming sea monster flick "Here There Be Monsters". No replacement has been picked and as of right now no reason has been given for Zemeckis' departure. I keep calling him but he must be busy or something. I'll keep trying though and let you know what I find out.

I trust everyone named Max. It's just a rule I live by. So even though I don't know a single thing Max Borenstein has done I still trust him to write the script for the upcoming remake/reboot of "Godzilla" for the Legendary Pictures. I'm not sure if they took my opinion into consideration while making their decision but I like to think they did.

Anthony Mackie has been added to the cast of the long awaited big screen adaptation of Max Brooks' "World War Z". The cast already includes Mr. Brad Pitt and Mireille Enos and is set to begin filming this summer. Mackie is currently filming "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter" and 7 other movies, but I hope he gets some time to really drink the beauty that is Brad Pitt. God, I'd love to just get a lock of his hair or something. I've said too much.

Jane Levy looks like she could be anywhere between 11 and 30, but now she's been added to the cast of the teen Halloween comedy "Fun Size" so that means she's got to be a teen right? Is it creepy that I'm even bringing her age up? Little bit right? Are you uncomfortable? You should be! Anyway, the film focuses on a young girl who takes her little brother trick-r-treating, loses him and then spends the night trying to track him down before her mother finds out. I'm on some sort of watch list now aren't I... damn this site!

Do you love Godzilla? Well then you're sure to have lukewarm feelings about the new spoof "Notzilla: Duke of the Monsters"! Alright, honestly the movie, which already has Patrick Warburton and George Takei attached to it, looks like it could be funny for a half hour or so, but it's currently looking for distribution and the good people behind the film have put out a trailer to get some buzz going. If you have about 1.5 million it could be yours. Won't you help!? Won't somebody think of the children!?

Remember when seeing names like Tony Todd, Kane Hodder and Tiffany Shepis in a cast meant you were going to see a quality film? No, me either, but that doesn't matter because all three have been cast in the new werewolf flick "Hallow Pointe". The story takes place at a bed and breakfast where a couple must fight to stay alive when they find themselves checked in on the night of a full moon. I swear to god if I have to sit through another Kane Hodder sex scene I'm never watching another movie. You've been warned!

Good news kids! The real Godzilla might be making a come back in late 2012. Word on campus is along with the American reboot that currently planned the good people at Toho are also in the works for a brand new rubber suit version. Merry Christmas honey, hope you like an hour and a half of pure misery!

Yesterday we saw "Husk" from the After Dark Originals series and today we see "The Task" and as much as it pains me to not hate two movies in a row I have to say I'm a sucker for stupid kids trapped in a building. Yes it's a blatant rip off of that crappy MTV show that use to be on but at least in this one people die. People die and there's a creepy ass clown that isn't Carson Daly! People get that reference, right?

The only two things I understood about the trailer for the South Korean film "The Housemaid" was the ridiculous amount of sex a married guy has with his maid and the AT&T ad that ran before the trailer started. From the quotes in the trailer though this will apparently be the greatest movie ever invented. Well that and AT&T really does have the best nationwide coverage around, hands down.

Tori Black is a porn star and she's got some sort of horror movie coming out called "Half Moon" where she plays a prostitute who's hard up for cash, AKA a bad prostitute. But honestly you probably clicked on the link once you saw the words porn star so you're not even reading this anymore so I could really say anything. Anyway there's new cover art for the film and I sob like a baby every time I watch "Rudy".