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Horror Headlines: Monday May 23rd, 2011

A new poster for John Carpenter's new flick "The Ward" has come out and don't even bother clicking the link because I'm going to explain it so well you won't even need to see it. Remember that scene in "Labyrinth" Jennifer Connelly falls down the hole and all the hands hold her up? Well it's just like that but with Amber Heard in a short skirt. See! No need to look at it now.

You know what "The Ring" was missing? An all female Japanese pop group! I know it's so obvious now that I've said it. Luckily the movie "White" is here to fix that with a gaggle of new photos and a full out trailer. The movie revolves around the pop group Pink Dolls (I think that's a pun) and the strange events that happen to them after they discover a mysterious video. Sounds super spooky and as a bonus, dance numbers!

Confused as to why there's a "Carrie" remake in the works? Well so is Stephen King. In a recent interview with Entertainment Weekly he asked the bold question "why, when the original was so good?". The remake is set to stay truer to King's original book but by his own admission the movie version was actually scarier. He then went on to ask "what's the deal with airplane food?" but by then I assume the interviewer had walked out.

While we all wait for a new "Child's Play" movie to happen the good people at TikGames have decided to bring Chucky to your console in the form of a new video game they hope to have out this fall. The game will apparently be the original story and allow players to control the little killer himself. Will it be awful? Probably. Will I pay money for it? You bet your sweet ass I will.

In Real People News: 

Police in Ohio are on the look out for a bank robber sporting a mullet who is apparently responsible for at least two robberies and countless broken hearts. Serious hold up in the front, party in the back. Of course I'm 99% sure that 3 out of 4 men in Ohio have mullets so narrowing this down might not be so easy after all.

Well the rapture came and went without so much as a Billy Crystal public stoning but tossing the words "zombie apocalypse" in a headline about hurricane season drove so much traffic to the CDC's website that it actually crashed. Unless the CDC's website crashing was the rapture. I thought there was suppose to be fire shooting out of the sky but a server reboot can be pretty awful too.

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