Pro-Wrestlers Vs. Zombies

Horror Headlines: Monday April 8th, 2013

Let's not get into why it's been so long since I posted the news. Let's just be happy that I'm back and plan for the next time I disappear for two weeks. Maybe start stocking up on Hot Pockets. Those are fun and help to pass the time.

The folks over at Lionsgate have picked up the US distribution rights to "Ritual", a new flick about a fella who finds his ex wife has murdered a stranger who happens to be connected to a dangerous cult. Semi-new director Mickey Keating leads this one and while there's no word on a release date the other territories will go up on the auction block next month at Cannes. I plan on picking up the rights to Guam. Gotta make that chedda.

Susan Surandon and Topher Grace would make the world's creepiest couple and the thought of them making love makes me throw up a little in my mouth but the good news here is that both of them have been confirmed for the cast of "The Calling" and not confirmed to be bumping uglies. The duo will play detectives who are on the hunt for a serial killer who's targeting the mentally ill. I bet their children would be adorable though. You can't argue that.

Sally Hawkins, who apparently is no relation to the smart guy in the wheelchair, is the latest name to be added to the cast of the upcoming "Godzilla" reboot. No word on what role she'll play but since she's British I assume she'll play a British doctor or maybe a British police officer. Or any of those roles without a British accent. Really I have no idea here.

"Pro-Wrestlers Vs. Zombies" is a real thing and the trailer looks a lot worse than you would expect. That's saying a lot I know.

In Real People News: 

A 64 year old woman is in hot water after she poured superglue in the eyes and ears of her 58 year old roommate. I think this was on that Betty White show right? Old people are so funny when they do zany stuff.

A Pennsylvania man is under arrest after he set his ex-girlfriends car on fire and emailed 400 of her college classmates nude photos of herself. I wonder which one she was madder about. I bet it was the nude photos thing. Unless she had a really nice car. Like a Neon or something. You can't replace those you know.

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