Johann Urb

Horror Headlines: Friday September 30th, 2011

Did you ever read that book "My Brother Sam is Dead" in middle school? I didn't but I was suppose too. I'm really sorry Mr. Reynolds... you creepy mustached SOB. Well "John Dies At the End" is nothing like that book but today it's got its first poster with all kinds of skull goodness. The movie tells the story of two college drop outs who are trying to stop an onslaught of terror brought on by a strange drug that hits the streets. I just used the word onslaught.

Some behind the scenes photos from "Piranha 3DD" have hit the tubes and they're pretty much what you'd expect from the sequel that takes our man-eating fish to a water park. Unless you didn't expect augmented women in tiny swimsuits. While I don't recognize any of the women from porn there's one with a giant tattoo that is leading me to believe she's done some questionable acting in her day. We can only hope and pray now.

I'm going to address this one directly to Mark because he'll probably be the most excited about it. Hey Mark! Good news. They're rebooting the "Mortal Kombat" franchise with a new film based on the popular web series "Mortal Kombat: Legacy". One catch though. It's going to be directed by Kevin Tancharoen, who did direct the web series but also the "Glee" 3D movie and "Fame" remake. Anyway! How have you been? How's Chicago? Have you been to Millennium Park yet? I hear it's wonderful this time of year.

And lastly Johann Urb, who rivals Sarah Jessica Parker for longest face in Hollywood, has signed on to play Leon Kennedy in "Resident Evil: Retribution" along side Milla Jovovich and her mom hips. So that's some exciting news huh? Got any plans for the weekend? Fall is finally here! You look fat in those jeans.

In Real People News: 

There's really no better excuse than the one this New York woman gave the cops for running over a man. "He asked for it". Enough said...

Sometimes you're in such a hurry that you forget something important. Like your wallet, keys or your bus pass. The last one I do all the time. I have never forgotten my child though. Not even when I'm drunk driving and flip my car like this woman did in California. Well not yet at least.

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