Happy Gilmore

Horror Headlines: Tuesday January 11th, 2011

Despite every fiber in my tiny brain telling me otherwise "Sucker Punch" is in no way a Skin-emax flick. Yes it is about a bunch of half naked women trapped in a prison but I guess that's where the similarities end. Anyway there's a new giant poster for it out and it's full of everything I said and more. I'm so confused.

"Ghost Adventures" sounds like possibly the worst show ever imagined but this Friday's might not be so awful. Kane Hodder, R.A. Mihailoff and Rick McCallum all join the team this week as they hunt for ghosts or look for bigfoot or some crap. I have no clue but there's a trailer for the episode you should watch it and get back to me.

Neve Campbell, don't think making out with Denise Richards could make up for all those Scream movies... or the trailer for the new indie flick "The Glass Man" which focuses on a couple who's all happy and stuff and then isn't for some reason. That's all I really got out of the trailer.

Danny Boyle kind of looks like the asshole guy from "Happy Gilmore" doesn't he? That has nothing to do with the fact that he recently confirmed he's got a "good idea" for "28 Months Later" but I still think it's important to point out. You're welcome.

In Real People News: 

There's nothing more exciting than hitting the open road and letting the wind blow in your hair. And what better way to enjoy such a feeling than cruising the highway in your electric wheelchair like this guy in Connecticut.

In what I'm guessing is a glimpse into my future here's a story about a couple who couldn't make it to the hospital fast enough so they decided to give birth to their child on the side of the Garden State Parkway in new Jersey. Hits a little too close to home really.

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