Chuck Palahniuk

Horror Headlines: Tuesday June 28th, 2011

Hey remember Haley Joel Osment? The little fella who could see dead people in "The Sixth Sense" and creeped his way into all of our hearts back in 1999? Well it looks like he's back in the horror genre with a starring role in the upcoming Frankenstein flick "Wake the Dead". The movie is based on a novel by Steve Niles and it appears Osment will play the mad doctor Victor Frankenstein. So I guess his character will see dead people. Get it? Cause ya know... the Frankenstein monster was dead or something... Comedic gold.

Speaking of 1999, another film called "The Blair Witch Project" came out that year also. Well Eduardo Sanchez, one half of the writing and directing team behind the Blair Witch, is heading back into the woods with his new film "Exists". The movie will follow a group of teenagers who find themselves trapped in a cabin in the middle of a forrest being attacked by a bigfoot like creature. There better be some close up shots of people's snot. You can't top the classics.

Jim Uhls, who adapted Chuck Palahniuk's book "Fight Club" for the big screen, and Trent Reznor are teaming up to create a new mini series for HBO based on the Nine Inch Nails album "Year Zero". The series will take place in the year 2022 and show a world run by a corrupt government. And needless to say I will be both bored and confused by the entire thing.

Lauren Cohan, who wasn't on "The Hills" apparently and Scott Wilson are the latest additions to the ever growing cast of the second season of "The Walking Dead". Wilson will play the owner of a farm that the traveling group ends up on and Cohen will play his daughter. I hope she doesn't end up with that jerk Brody Jenner. She can do so much better than him and he's only after one thing.

In Real People News: 

Little tip for the ladies out there. If the cops show up at your house because you've been beating the crap out of your boyfriend a sure fire way to get out of going to jail is not biting the arresting officer. Sounds obvious I know but a 30 year old woman in Ohio is under arrest for just that. And the kicker is now that she claims to be HIV positive. I bet she gets off with a warning.

And fellas this one is for you. If the cops show up because there's been complaints about loud arguments you might want to wait till after they leave before urinating on your significant other like this guy in South Carolina did. Or not doing it at all. I should say don't pee on your loved one at all, right? Yeah.. don't do it.

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