Hey are you watching "American Horror Story"?! No? Well I hate your stupid face! Sorry. I didn't mean that. But the FX show has been getting some decent buzz and now Mena Suvari and Kathleen Rose Perkins will both be guest starting on the show. Going to watch now? If you care about our relationship you will.
Teller, the one who doesn't talk in Penn & Teller, is creating a stage adaptation of William Peter Blatty's "The Exorcist" which will open in NY next year. The story will focus more on the questions of faith rather than the exoticism itself so it'll be a large change from the movie adaptation. There will also be no spoken parts. Should be interesting.... that last part is a lie.
Corey Feldman is in haunted Halloween attraction flick "Six Degrees of Hell" and I'm 99% sure I wouldn't be talking about it if he wasn't but here's a new trailer for the movie. Enjoy it. Or don't. I'm not the boss of you. And yes I know I've made the same joke before. Thanks for pointing out my flaws.
Bruce Dern leave "Lords of Salem". Bruce Davidson replace. Chris Knight join cast. He was Greg Brady.
I got Feldman fever folks! And the cure right now is some new stills from his upcoming spooky new supernatural flick "Six Degrees Of Hell". I'm not sure I would be talking about the movie if Feldman wasn't in it but if you think about it I wouldn't be talking about Feldman if he wasn't in "Dream a Little Dream". Did I just mind F you so hard that you need a cigarette?
Let's be honest there's no real reason we should be covering "Real Steel" on this site but the fact that the movie stars Hugh Jackman as a father trying to bond with his son by fixing up a fighting robot means I will give this thing more coverage than "Scream", "Nightmare on Elm Street" and "Friday the 13th" combined. It's that important. And today there's an adorable new Brazilian poster for the film that has Jackman looking like a dream boat while two robots fight. My heart has never felt this kind of warmth.
"Straw Dogs" has officially shot it's way to the number 1 spot on my list of most un-needed remakes. But it's happening and today there's a couple new clips from the movie that hits theaters on September 16th. For those of you who don't remember the original it stared Dustin Hoffman as man who moves to a small town with his wife and begins being terrorized by some local workers. Things get uncomfortable... in a "Last House On the Left" sort of way.
Indie zombie flicks are usually about as fun as... well indie zombie flicks but every once in a while you come up with a winner. I can't think of any off the top of my head but I'm sure there's one out there. Was "Shaun of the Dead" indie or just British? Anyway "Extinction: The G.M.O. Chronicles" is indie and by god it looks pretty decent. At least the zombies do. I don't know, watch the trailer and shut your face.
Hey, they're still making "Child of the Corn" movies? Who knew! Well here's the new trailer for "Children of the Corn: Genesis" and from the looks of things the filmmakers have fallen on hard times because there appears to be only 4 or 5 children and hardly any corn. I imagine we're only 1 or 2 movies away from "Children of the Government Cheese".
Just to keep the good times rolling here's a couple new stills from "Six Degrees of Hell". I'm not going to bother explaining the plot because I don't think there is one but it stars none other than Mr. Corey Feldman along side Nicole Cinaglia. I mention the second only because I Googled her and while I didn't recognize any of her movies I did recognize the fact that she's dressed like a street walker in half the images she has online. So that's some news, right?
And speaking of mom jeans... I'm sure we were just talking about mom jeans... here's a new trailer for the new Milla Jovovich flick titled "Faces in the Crowd", which drops this October. In the movie Jovo (I just made that up) plays a woman who's attacked by a serial killer and wakes up to find she's suffering from "Face Blindness". I'm not even making that up. They say it right in the trailer. Watch it. I'm pretty sure it's a real thing.
And to top of the worst news day in history it's been confirmed that Jean-Claude Van Damme will star along side his daughter in a new sci-fi thriller that's cleverly titled "UFO". If you couldn't have guessed the movie focuses on a group of friends and what happens when UFO's hover above their hometown. I assume the secret to the alien's weakness will somehow focus on being able to do a full split and wearing tight jeans.
In Real People News:
I could have sworn everyone in Canada was suppose to be nice but a group of kids are under arrest after attacking and killing an Ottawa man with a broken putter at a glow in the dark miniature golf course. The Swiss are still nice, right?
I bet a 12 year old tripping face is the most adorable thing on the planet but before you go getting any ideas you might want to read this story about an Omaha couple who are under arrest after they gave their daughter shrooms. Wrong? Yes, but I bet it was a hell of a lot funnier than that youtube video of the kid all f'ed up from getting nitrous at the dentist.