monster butler

Horror Headlines: Thursday, May 31st, 2012

If you know one thing about me it's that I love... LOVE... Japanese Sci-Fi novels. I can't get enough of them. So the news that my all time fave book, "Tokisuna no Ou (The Lord of the Sands of Time)" is being turned into a big time movie. For those of you not as cool as me the book is about a group of people sent back in time to try to stop an alien invasion that wiped out the human race. Wait if they wiped out the human race how are the people alive to go back? Oh jeez ya got me, I have no idea what this thing is.

So last week we talked about how Sean Durkin had been lined up to do a new mini series based on "The Exorcist", telling the tale that leads up to where the first film picked up. Well it turns out that was a lie, or at least that's what William Peter Blatty, the author and rights holder of the story, says. And I'd guess he would know. But good news is he's got his own mini-series based on the novel that he's hoping to pimp out. So ya know, first sweet, then sour. They should make a candy based on this too.

"Monster Butler" sounds like it would be a laugh out lound romp but in reality it's about a real life serial killer/theif/bi-sexual con man. Not nearly as funny as a mutant that walks around a mansion serving caviar and crap. Dominic Monaghan and Gary Oldman have been added to the cast. Neither of them are funny though. This is the most un-funny post ever.

Conor McMahon's zombie killer clown flick "Stitches" has been picked up by the fine folks at Kaleidoscope Entertainment and Signature Entertainment for a Halloween release in the U.K. No news on when it'll hit these fine States so this one is all for your Brits. Let's call it even for that whole tea party thing.

In Real People News: 

Not going to lie this has happened to me on more than 1 occasion and I've thought of doing the same thing. An Ohio man rammed his truck into a Taco Bell after they forgot to give him his taco. His did this over a taco. I drove all the way home once and realized they forgot my Mexi-Melt. I should be given an award for not burning the whole thing down. They did give me free cinna-sticks for my trouble though. So I guess that was kind of nice.

A 35 year old Alabama woman is under arrest after she decided to take a drive down to Florida, pull over on the side of the road, and go to town on herself while sitting on the hood of her car while passing motorists watched. I thought Florida had enough problems with its own crazy people now they have to worry about people from other states coming there to do their weird crap.

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