embarrassing ways to die

Horror Headlines: Friday April 17th, 2009

Sam Raimi's "Drag Me To Hell" has officially been rated PG-13. Apparently there are people surprised by this... haven't you seen the trailer?

Poster for that French zombie film "Mutants" I told you about last week. I'm sure it doesn't mean the same thing in English, but I was really intrigued by the words "PLUS TARD" on the poster. That's a new one.

Akroyd gives more details on "Ghostbusters 3". Apparently the "young recruits" we've mentioned will be "cadets" at some kind of academy. That is AWESOME. He also says that they are going to do everything they can to get Sigourney Weaver on board, who seems to be the last holdout in restarting the franchise.

The plot is pretty standard but the title isn't. Today's awesome indie title award goes to Albino Farm. That is all.

Ron Perlman says they'll probably be shooting "Bubba Nosferatu" this Fall. I still don't think he'll make a great Elvis, but since he's terrifying I'm pretty sure he wins every argument no matter what.

If you live in New York or Las Angeles, you will see a teaser for Rob Zombie's "H2" before "Crank 2" this weekend. If you're not in those areas, tough luck. You will see Amy Smart's boobs though, and that is the greatest gift anyone could ask for.

In Real People News: 

The founders of The Pirate Bay, one of the world's largest Torrent tracking sites, have been on trial for some time now in Sweden over the breaking of copyright law. Today the trial ended with each of the founders being fined 3.6 million each, and being sent to jail for one year. The case is expected to be appealed.

Moral of this story, don't try to rob a hairdresser in Russia. She's liable to beat your ass, tie you up, kidnap you and make you her sex slave for 2 days straight. Bet you didn't see that one coming.

Bush Administration memos on torture released by the Obama administration revealed today that they had authorized "putting insects inside a confinement box" as a method of interrogation. Who knew they were taking cues from Jigsaw and Fear Factor! And you thought they were culturally inept.

Just when I thought I had heard of all the most embarrassing ways to die, here comes British Comedian Mark Cassidy with this gem: Overdosing on nitrous oxide (laughing gas) while watching internet porn. [golf clap]

On this day in history: 

1965: The FBI Laboratory in Washington reports their inability to make out the vocals on the hit single "Louie Louie." Thus, the Bureau is unable to determine whether the record constitutes obscene matter.

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