So, I spent the entire weekend without electricity, wandering around between friends and family seeking warm shelter like a wayward gypsy. Mental note: not a fan of ice storms anymore. The point is that while I really had nothing better to do, my ruminating turned toward the upcoming holiday. To that end, I have composed a wish list of things I'd like see to happen as a favor to me. Most, but not all, are music related. They appear in no order.
M. Drew's Holiday Wish List!
-I wish people would stop trying to explain to me why I should love Lamb of God. Been there, tried it, saw it live twice, it's just not going to happen.
-I wish Rob Zombie would concentrate on music, and this time come out with an album that's not an astounding disappointment.
-I wish an American metal band under the age of forty would step up and deliver a knockout punch. I'm the last guy who could be called a metal xenophobe, but it's about time this side of the pond put up a fight.
-I wish someone besides me would realize that Trivium is not the band that's going to deliver the wish I have above. They're not very good. There, I said it.
-I wish the Screaming Trees were still together.
-I wish Chris Osgood would come back to form so the Wings have a chance come May.
-I wish Soundgarden would have a reunion tour. Naturally, because they broke up on amiable terms, this will never happen. Unless a band is throwing bottles at each other, there's never a reunion tour.
-I wish The Cursed would go on tour.
-I wish Clutch would back away from becoming a jam band. Was anyone else underwhelmed by the Beale Street album? What happened to Pure Rock Fury?
-I with the Mets would trade Aaron Heilman. Oh wait, that happened, thank God.
-I wish there was some solid info out there about the new Priestess album/tour. Can't trust those Quebecois to have reliable info lately.
-I wish more rap artists would spend less time talking about how they're inspired by Eric B and Rakim, and spend more time trying to sound like Eric B and Rakim.
-Along those lines, I wish this horrible new trend of digitizing one's voice would die. Not only is it insipid and facile, but in fifteen years, it's going to horribly date all the music from this era, and people will look at our age group and wonder what the hell we were thinking. Won't matter if we were fans or not. And boy, am I ever not.
-I wish someone could explain to me in rational terms why they think Dane Cook is funny. See also, Stephen Wright, Tyler Perry, et al.
-I wish I could devote more time to finding myself some new dynamite speed metal.
-I wish American metal hadn't wholesale succumb to the machinations of the double kick.
-I wish the Spurs would get out of cruise control before February.
-I wish I could have seen the Dead Kennedys, circa 1985, live in concert. See also, The Ramones, Green River, et al.
-I wish someone could explain to me why Tim Tebow can get the most first place votes and still lose the Heisman. Not that Bradford didn't deserve it, but it seems odd.
-While I'm on the subject, I wish the NCAA would get off their damn high horse and install a playoff system.
-I wish Layne Staley were still alive, if for no other reason than because it seems unfair that he's passed away and Scott Weiland still walks the earth.
-This one was already granted: I was going to wish for the return of The Agents, the band that I've dubbed "the best band no one has ever heard of." They're easily on the list of my favorite non-metal bands (right up there with Public Enemy,) and I've been trying to pimp them out to people for years. Seems they're playing a show on New Year's Eve in their hometown of Providence. I'm not much for ska, but the brand of swing/reggae/ska that they put out is really excellent.
-I hope the Wolverine movie doesn't suck.
-I hope Anthrax's new album doesn't suck. C'mon guys, don't let me down.
-I wish the Raiders didn't suck, and would give me some hope that they won't suck next year, or the year after, or the year after....
-I wish all of you and yours a happy/peaceful holiday of your choice. Spend it doing whatever makes you happy.