robert englund

Hideo Nakata, the guy who made "Ringu", has signed on to direct the remake of the Korean film "Haunters". The film is about a man who can control people with his mind and the one guy who seems to be immune to him. It's also about me thinking the titled was "Hunters" at first. That really doesn't make any difference here though. Just a fun fact.

Tomorrow is the 4th of July. Pretty much everyone has checked out at this point. News is slow. "ThanksKilling 3" is coming to DVD in October, just in time for Halloween. By the team you read this I'll probably be drunk.

"Fear Clinic" is a new movie that will star Robert Englund and Danielle Harris if you help fund it. The film will focus on a group of patients undergoing a special treatment that shows them their greatest fears in order to cure them. Funny enough, my greatest fear is a love scene between England and Harris. How much do I have to donate for that not to happen?

Do you want to see fan art for the movie "Carrie"? No me either but Screen Gems has launched a tumblr site where fans can upload and view each others art. Look I said it's a slow day alright.

NBC has landed "Lost" writer Carlton Cuse (awful name) to pen the script for their new supernatural Western show "The 6th Gun". The show is about... well it's about six guns that hold mystical powers and one of them falls into the hands of a girl and then bad stuff happens or something. I don't know, it's based on a comic, I assume there's giant boobs and other things that are sexy in comic form but only in your mom's basement.

Robert Englund and Malcolm McDowell, two guys who randomly pop up in just about every horror movie and no one has any idea why, together at last in one film. Truth be told there's a solid chance they've been in a movie together before but I have no motivation to do any research on that. The film is "Sanitarium" and it's a new anthology flick about 3 different patients in a mental hospital. It also stars Lou Diamond Phillips who I honestly believe is the nicest man ever invented. He's also La Bamba.

Speaking of people who were on one episode of the short lived "Adam's Family" TV show reboot, Keegan Connor Tracy has been confirmed to be joining the cast of "Bates Motel". The show comes from the folks over at A&E and the pale little minx will play Norman's teacher. We were talking about "The New Adams Family" right?

I loved the show "Deadwood" more than life itself and therefore anything that Ian McShane does is pure gold. You can't argue it. So his guest spot on "American Horror Story: Asylum" will be gold. The show will be gold, the episode will be gold and the tears of joy I cry as he prances across the tiny screen will be solid gold. It's going to hurt.

★ ★ ½

Abigail Breslin, who stole our hearts in "Little Miss Sunshine" has officially been confirmed to be taking the lead in Vincenzo Natali's new flick "Haunter". The story revolves around a girl who dies tragically in the late 80's and reaches out from beyond the grave to help a family avoid the same fate. If she tripped over a Rubik's Cube or something and fell down the stairs, I think the coast is clear on a repeat.

Here's a good one. "Sucker" is a new flick from the gentleman who played Wyatt in the "Weird Science" TV series. That's not even a joke. What's the film about you might ask? Why, just your average run of the mill man-turning-into-a-giant-mosquito that's all. Is it kind of a rip off of "The Fly"? Maybe. But it still sounds pretty cool and Lloyd Kaufman is in the cast. I don't know what else you people want.

I'm not trying to be the guy who doesn't like the movie that everyone likes here but I did not care for "Avatar". There, I said it. In all fairness I didn't see it in the theaters so maybe that's it. I kind of wanted the army guys to win. Those blue people were annoying. So I'm not that devastated by the news that "Avatar 2" will most likely not hit it's December 2014 release date. I also don't really like "Day Of the Dead". God, it feels good to get all this out there.

In a recent interview the burned one himself Robert Englund waxed poetic (I don't think I'm useing that right)... (that's what she said) about the "Nightmare on Elm Street" prequel that never came to be. Apparently there was even a script floating around about the events that led up to Freddy coming to be the nightmare stalker but the fat cats in Hollywood never got it off the ground. Stupid fat cats and their fat cat love of fat cat food. That makes no sense, I know.

I'm not sure a logo is actually news but here's the new one for the "Evil Dead" reboot that will at least give people a chance to bitch about there being a reboot. The flick won't hit theaters till sometime in 2013 and if you're not in the know like I am the big twist on this update is that Ash, or whatever they're going to call him, is taking his sister to a cabin in the woods to help her kick her drug habit. That's going to make all the makeout scenes a lot weirder I bet.

I'm going to go ahead and say it. "True Blood" is the worst thing to ever happen to TV. Yeah yeah I know you think Snookie or whatever the hell her name is is hot but that doesn't change anything. So why do I still report on it you might ask? Well who the hell are you to question my selection of news items? Go to hell! Lucy Griffiths is joining the cast next year. She's British and will play Eric Northman's sister. Is that alright with you!?

Mr. Robert Englund has been confirmed for Syfy's next installment in the "Lake Placid" series currently titled "Lake Placid: The Final Chapter". If you couldn't have guessed by the title the good people at Syfy are saying this will be the last installment in the giant crock attack series. I assume there will be some sort of parade in Hollywood to celebrate all of this magic. Maybe a national day of mourning.

In other casting news, it looks like the walking corpse that is Alice Cooper has been cast in Tim Burton's big screen adaptation of the "Dark Shadows". Cooper will play himself in the flick which takes place in 1972. And I can't think of another good "he's really old" joke so just make up your own here.

Emma Stone has reportedly been offered the leading role in Grahame-Smith's constantly changing "Pride and Prejudice and Zombies". Natalie Portman, who is now a producer on the film had at one time been rumored for the role along with Anne Hathaway and a number of other actresses. So keep your fingers crossed that Stone turns it down. I've heard rumors my name is rapidly moving to the top of the list for this.

Riki Lindhome, who has an IMDB page that leads me to believe she's been on one episode of 75% of the TV shows that have been made in the last 5 years, is the latest name to be added to the growing cast of the Halloween night comedy "Fun Size". The film which follows a pissy teenage girl as she tries to find her missing brother on Halloween night before their mother finds out also includes the comedic stylings of Johnny Knoxville, Jane Levy, Ana Gasteyer and Chelsea Handler. Because nothing's funnier than a good ole' missing child story.

If you liked "Strippers VS Zombies" then you're going to have lukewarm feelings about the new poster for "Strippers VS Werewolves". The movie, which Robert Englund is already attached to, focuses on a group of strippers that find their places of business being invaded by an angry pack of werewolves. Pray Englund isn't one of the strippers, pray a lot.

Speaking of Robert Englund... 2007's "Jack Brooks: Monster Slayer" was a comedic romp filled with over the top blood and guts. But from the looks of the new trailer for "The Shrine" it appears the makers have lost their funny bone and replaced it with some sort of creepy spooky bone. I think that's medically accurate. The movie follows a group of campers as they venture into a small Polish village that turns out to practice a strange human sacrifice ritual. I assume this is what happens to anyone who is stupid enough to leave their couch and go wondering off into strange Polish villages.

Katrina Bowden from "30 Rock" and "Tucker and Dale Vs. Evil" is the latest hot chick to be added to the cast of "Piranha 3DD". As we all know Gary Busey was also added to the cast last week and while it hasn't been confirmed I think it's pretty obvious that we now know who will be involved in the movie's love story. I'd like to think the chemistry will find it's way off screen as well and we'll have Hollywood's next power couple.

"Cobra the Space Pirate" is some sort of Japanese animated series that I'm sure someone I went to college with told me was "completely insane" while I didn't get any action at a party, and for that reason alone I now hate it. But alas there's a movie being made about it and today we've got our first look at the poster for the flick. If it gets you excited you're only a little over 2 years away from it's summer 2012 release.

If you're anxiously awaiting the release of "Haunted 3D" then you're one step ahead of me because I've never heard of the damn thing until 10 minutes ago. But that doesn't matter because a handful of theaters will be showing India's first 3D flick this coming weekend. Of course none of the selected theaters are in major cities so you big wigs can suck it. Jersey's got 2 of the 8 selected locations!

Starting today you can get your grubby mits on "Call of Duty: Black Ops Escalation - Call of the Dead" via Xbox Live and to celebrate a new poster has hit the tubes for the game. In the Black Ops add on you can actually play as Robert Englund, Danny Trejo, Michael Rooker and Sarah Michelle Gellar and none other than George A. Romero is featured in the game as a zombie. Which is exciting because there's numerous movies I'd love to shoot him in the face for. Score!

The first trailer for Lars Von Trier's new end of the world flick "Melancholia" has hit the tubes and much to my surprise it looks fairly un-hammer-to-the-penis-like. Yes that women who took a hammer to William Defeo's penis in "Antrichrist" is in this movie, so you keep thinking about it, but there's nothing to lead me to believe that's going to happen again. God I hope that doesn't happen again.

Speaking of Willem Dafoe and his lumbering manbits, they'll both be in the upcoming big screen adaptation of Dean Kootz's "Odd Thomas". The story focuses on a cook who's able to speak to the dead. Defoe plays a police chief who knows the young lad's secret. I have no clue if Defoe's member will be playing a different role.

It looks as if Rob Hall's "Fear Clinic" mini-series will be making it's way to the big screen, and Danielle Harris and Robert Englund are both on board for the magic. For those of you who aren't familiar with the series or Rob Hall's spiky hair, it follows a group of patients who come to a clinic in order to cure the phobias that run their lives. Much like the god awful fear I have of Willem Dafoe's privates. Let's keep this going!

Jessica Biel his apparently been offered a role in the upcoming "Total Recall" remake. No confirmation on which role she's been offered but chances are it's one of the two leads. She doesn't seem like the kind of girl who would be into playing that big women who has an exploding head or the three boobed hooker. Then again what do I know, I'm still focused on Willem Dafoe's flim flam. Happy Monday folks!