Further proof that there is no god, Mr. Tom Six himself has taken to the twitters to announce that "The Human Centipede 3" will feature no less then 500 plus people joined together. Sometimes I wish I was never born.
The words "erotic-thriller" make me really uncomfortable. Probably because the last time I saw a movie that was considered that it had Madonna pouring hot candle wax on Willem Dafoe's nipples. But "Attachment" is apparently a new one starring beaver vet Sharon Stone and today we've learned that Tom Felton has also joined the cast as the college student who has a one night stand with a married woman played by Stone. I pray for no candle wax. Or at least no Willem Dafoe.
"Piranha 3DD" has been a bit up in the air as of late but today we've learned that Dimension Films has given the boob-sploitation romp a June 1st release date. In case you've forgotten the film will be released both in theaters and VOD on the same day. Ya know, in case you can't handle seeing that kind of stuff with an audience. You sicko.
Of the 37 horror shows coming out shortly "666 Park Avenue" is the one that actually sounds kind of interesting. The show will focus on a couple that takes over running an apartment building that houses a number of residents who've sold their souls to the D-man. Matt Miller, the guy who produced "Chuck" has just signed on as executive producer of the show. I have no idea if that's a good thing or not.
In Real People News:
Way to think outside the box. A woman in Culver City California is dead after what appears to be suicide by chainsaw. I have no idea how you even go about doing something like that. The planning must have taken days.
If you liked "Rise of the Planet of the Apes" then get ready because it looks like the writers have a trilogy in mind. Or have always had in mind. How quickly they decided this after the film made a boat load of money no one knows but let's pretend it was always the plan. That makes it nicer.
It looks like the long awaited sequel to "The Wicker Man", the original not the Nic Cage masterpiece, titled "The Wicker Tree" will hit theaters in early 1012 thanks for the good people at Anchor Bay. The sequel tells the story of two newcomers who come to Scotland only to run into a strange group of religious fanatics. I hope they wear weird animal head dresses again.
Showtime is pushing the "Dexter" promos so much you'd almost think season 6 isn't still a month and a half away. But anyway there's a new poster for your peepers to view and it's crafty because it's got Dexter with a bunch of blood behind him. But wait, the blood looks like wings. You just mind f'ed me lonely designer who spent hours on this and 74 other posters only to have some jackass on a horror website mock it. I'm so sorry.
Good news America. It looks like Tom Six will be setting "The Human Centipede 3" in the good old U.S. of A. Wait, it gets better. According to Six the third installment will make the second look like a "Disney film". I love Disney films so I can't wait for the second, which will see a limited release in the states on October 7th. Disney films and America? I believe you have warmed your way into my heart Mr. Six.
In Real People News:
I'm not sure what kind of standards Olympic skiers have to live up to in the US but I'm pretty sure urinating on an 11 year old on a flight is not considered appropriate. Unfortunately that's just what an 18 year old team member did on a red eye flight to NY the other day. But hey the swimmer guy smoked a lot of pot. That's worse, right?
If you've ever driven through Pennsylvania than you know those back woods hicks drive like mental patients. To drive home the point here's a lovely story about an Aunt who didn't think she could handle getting out of a tight parking spot. Her solution to the problem? Having her six year old niece give it a go. Sure, why not.