guillermo del toro

Horror Headlines: Thursday November 17th, 2011

A few weeks back we talked about how it looked like "The Munsters" would once again be coming to the small screen in the form of a new TV series. Well it looks like NBC has finally given the new project, which promises to be a darker version of the classic black and white show, the thumbs up. No word yet on cast but Bryan Fuller, who brought you "Pushing Daisies" will be leading the project. Or don't you remember our talks? It's not just physical for me you know!

To up the hotness level of his new film "Pacific Rim" Guillermo del Toro has added Ron Perlman to the cast list. The movie is an epic battle giant robots vs. giant monsters and I will officially start taking bets to to which one Perlman will play.

It's no surprise that a big screen version of "Catching Fire", the second book in the 3 part "Hunger Games" series, is already being produced. It might be a surprise that Simon Beaufoy, the writer of "Slumdog Millionaire", is being eyed to adapt the book. I say it might be a surprise because I assume you're all racist and terrible people. I didn't even bat an eye at the news. I guess I just don't see things the way you do.

One of the most embarrassing things that's ever happened to me was farting in the middle of science class in the fifth grade. Luckily the teacher had stepped out of the room but unfortunately it was during the middle of a test so the room was dead silent. I don't think I ever got over that. By the way, here's some behind the scenes photos from the set of Rob Zombie's "Lords Of Salem".

In Real People News: 

I had no idea that you could get high off of bath salts but apparently you can. Apparently the high also puts you in a festive spirit because this guy in Ohio got all doped up on them, broke into a home and set up Christmas decorations. I don't think I see any down side to this.

Here's a story about a black guy in Florida who dressed up as a Klan member and burned a cross on his front lawn to scare his wife. Insane? Yes, but you have to imagine it worked.

Mimic: Director's Cut (REVIEW)

I've talked about my childhood enough in my reviews that I'm sure you've been able to deduce what everyone who knows me knows to be true; I was a pretty weird kid. My favorite movie when I was 10? "Evil Dead". Favorite TV show? "Twin Peaks". Boyhood crush? Mira Sorvino. At some point, my Dad took me to go see "Mimic" in theaters and something about the blonde beauty caused 11 year old me to start seriously crushing.

Episode 176 - "Don't Be Afraid of the Dark"

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Find out why this summer horror film has the crew all in a tizzy.

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Retro Trailer: "Don't Be Afraid of the Dark" (1973)

I just got back from seeing the remake of "Don't Be Afraid of the Dark" and I enjoyed myself quite a bit. Now, I don't have a great nostalgic love for the original; in fact, I have only seen bits and pieces of it over the past few years so I didn't go in to the theater with any great reservations over a remake. I am a sucker for the over the top gothic imagery and the dark fairytale atmosphere that can really only be created on these types of films.

Don't Be Afraid of the Dark (REVIEW)

"Don't be Afraid of the Dark", a remake of a 1973 made-for-tv movie by the same name, is ultimately a film about childhood innocence, fairy tales-turned real life evil, and how ignorant adults are of things that go bump in the night… in other words, it's a Guillermo Del Toro movie.

What Spooks the Masters of Horror?

I recently came across an article published by Jason Zinoman of the NY Times discussing what makes horror fans and horror directors tick. With the increasing number of horror films that have been packed into the theater this summer, especially this month, its clear that horror movies have been in the mainstream eye a bit more so than usual. However, to many of us seasoned horror fans, we've seen so many throat slashing, stabbing and torture scenes that it takes a lot to truly scare us. With all that horror directors have seen and done with their own films, they are no different.

Snapshot: "Julia's Eyes" (2010)

Belen Rueda ("The Orphanage") stars as twin sisters Julia and Sara in the upcoming release from Spanish director Guillem Morales, "Julia's Eyes". Guillermo Del Toro's produced the film, which has definitely helped it create quite a buzz in early reviews. The film centers around Julia, who is trying to deal with her sister's apparent suicide while also dealing with her impending blindness due to a degenerative illness. IFC Films will be distributing the movie in the US via limited theatrical release later this month and then releasing it on VOD shortly after. Check out the trailer below:

Horror Headlines: Monday July 25th, 2011

The website for the Guillermo del Toro co-written frightfest "Don't Be Afraid Of the Dark" has hit the tubes for your time wasting enjoyment. Normally I wouldn't give a crap about a website launch but this one is actually pretty cool. Spooky voices that whisper your name and some hot webcam action make it all kinds of fun. Although it's probably going to be a giant let down after I built it up with promises of "hot webcam action".

All kind of news around "The Walking Dead" seems to be flying out of Comic-Con and probably the most exciting is that season 2 now officially has a premiere date of Sunday, October 16. The second most exciting thing is that a trailer for the upcoming season has been released. Third most exciting is a bunch of stills. Fourth most exciting is that to date I have not been notified that I won't be signed on to the cast for season 3.

AMC has officially announced a four part mini-series based on Stephan King's "Bag of Bones", a story that focuses on a man haunted by the loss of his wife. Pierce Brosnan and Anabeth Gish are both confirmed for the project which begins filming next month. Proof once again that if you wait long enough every book will be turned into moving pictures. The point here is reading is dumb.

The first trailer for the live action role playing kiddnapping succubus flick (seriously) "Knights of Badassdom" has hit the net thanks to all things Comic-Con and it looks hella good, son. Do people still say hella good? Ya know, like that No Doubt song? Is No Doubt still popular? They broke up?! Oh god.

In Real People News: 

A 29 year old Connecticut women is under arrest after forcing her 4 year old son and 10 month old daughter to drink beer and ingest cocaine. According to the woman her son "likes Natural Ice beer and Budweiser, but doesn’t like the taste of Dog Bite." I promise you this, my newborn daughter will never drink that crap. She'll only drink good beer.

A 39 year old Louisiana man is facing charges after sexting photos of his erect manhood to 5 female real estate agents whose contact info he got off of signs. This is great to know because I myself am currently doing some apartment hunting and just assumed this kind of thing was a perfectly normal part of doing business.

Horror Headlines: Tuesday June 21st, 2011

Fans of the first two "Hellboy" films might want to cover up their cereal bowls because I'm about to piss all over your Wheaties. According to Hellboy creator Mike Mignola there's no chance of director Guillermo del Toro ever returning to make a third film. So i guess that does mean a 3rd film could be made without del Toro but who the hell wants to see that. The Canadians maybe but not this guy. Those hockey rioting sickos would probably eat that crap up with ketchup.

For those of you who aren't complete burnouts an can remember all the way back to 2004 you might remember some pretty bold words from Danny Elfman about never working with Sam Raimi again after his experience on "Spiderman 2". Well it looks like the Elf Man has had a change of heart and has signed on to do the score of Sam's new "Wizard of OZ" inspired flick "OZ: The Great and Powerful". So good news for those of you who are still holding out for an Oingo Boingo reunion.

Remember the days when people actually enjoyed Wes Craven's movies? Well I do and you should respect your elders you snotty little smartass. Anyway his 1977 classic film "The Hills Have Eyes" is finally being given the Blu-Ray treatment and will hit shelves on September 6th. So far no word on extras yet but this might be a nice place to record a little apology for "My Soul to Take".

If you're like me then you're still washing your eyes our with soap and water after seeing a Kane Hodder sex scene in "Hatchet 2". But here's a new slasher flick staring the Hodster as a creepy gas station owner who also seems to be obsessed with women titled "Exit 33". The flick has just been given an August 2nd release date and I can't imagine we'll see any hot Hodder action in it but if we do it'll most likely be in a gas station bathroom. Can you imagine what that would smell like?

In Real People News: 

How the hell did they not think of this sooner? The fine people at New York's LaGuardia Airport have put in a place a new plan to take geese that are in the way of planes taking off and ship them off to Pennsylvania. What happens to them there? They're slaughtered, cooked and fed to homeless people! I hope the cook is wearing a loin cloth and listening to Viking metal while he throws the geese into the oven. That's the only way this could be more awesome.

And here's a story about Chinese scientists who have come up with a new genetically modified cow that can produce milk that's similar to human breast milk. No clue as to when something like this would become available but there's a 100% chance I will accidentally buy this and put it on my Lucky Charms.

Horror Headlines: Friday June 17th, 2011

The premiere we've all been waiting for is finally here my friends! Yes of course I speak of Rob Zombie's Woolite commercial and much to my surprise it looks like... well if Rob Zombie did a commercial for a laundry detergent. Shocking I know. Look for our podcast on the commercial coming in the next few weeks.

Looks like the good people behind the upcoming flick "Mansion of Blood" don't have nearly as much patience as the folks behind "The Gingerdead Man" films because they just shit canned Gary Busy from the lead role. Apparently Busy had already filmed about half of his scenes but his pain in the assness became too much and he was booted.

I love me some Guillermo Del Toro but I swear to Jesus if you break up "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" there will be hell to pay. Rumor has it that Del Toro is in talks with Sunny's Charlie Day to play a role in his upcoming monsters attack earth flick "Pacific Rim" which is set for a 2013 release. Then again there's a new season of Sunny coming out in between then and if it sucks like the last one did then he can go ahead and do whatever the hell he wants.

99% of horror comedies are neither funny nor scary and guess what folks, the upcoming Halloween romp "Fun Size" will not break the mold. How do I know this? Because Chelsea Handler has just been cast in the movie and she's not funny. If you think she is you're wrong and I'm sorry. Just because she's kind of pretty and swears a lot doesn't make her hilarious. Trust me, I pay $75 a ticket to watch her talk about diddling herself for an hour at Radio City Music Hall and I didn't crack a smile once. You drop $150 bucks and all of the sudden a goofy smile and low cut shirt isn't so funny. Learn from my mistakes!

In Real People News: 

Everyone likes a little show with their dinner, that's a fact. But when the little show ends up sending you to the hospital the fun ends. Such is the case for a group of diners in Florida who had to be rushed to the hospital after a banana foster preparation went all too wrong and burned a number of diners. Always order pudding people, no one gets hurt with pudding.

And here's a story about a 29 year old woman in Washington who is under arrest after she attacked her boyfriend's genitals with a knife during a fight. And that's all I can say about this without getting dizzy.

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